100 Hour Board

Was the Tricerotops a baker?

2010-09-20T12:51:00.001-04:00

Q: On a recent Scout hike, a heated debate developed during our woodly wanderings. Proudly standing on one side was a 12 year old insisting that grass did not exist during the era of the dinosaurs, and didn' t appear until after the great meteorite that brought mass extinction. On the other were several boys and leaders insisting that common sense pointed to the fact that grass did exist. There is honor, a little money and participation in future Scouting events riding on this. So. Did grass exist at the time of the dinosaurs?
The Vegan Raptor

A: Dear Poaceaen Minded,

It sounds like your adolescent dinophile is fairly caught up on the early eras of the earth and the development of land animals and plants. Or fairly so. You may not like the answer, but technically the 12 year old is right, and wrong. (What a safe cop-out). And until 2005 or so, he was mostly correct. Let's explain.

Grasses - specifically of the poaceaen or gramineae family - are a branch of flowering plants, even part of a greater group of monocotelydons (single seed leaf) that include pineapples, palms, orchids and lilies. We know grasses as things that produce food we eat - ryes, wheat, etc - and things we decorate with, i.e the lawn. The family includes bamboo, rice, and corn, and includes 9-10,000 species.

But this plant family that dominates our lives and cuisine, is relatively new. Lets describe the history briefly, as understood up through 2004, best summarized by Elizabeth Kellogg. Using rDNA studies of the chloropast genome (a sub-cell structure in plants) scientists can begin to create a family tree of grasses to show their development. You have to go pretty far back to find a common ancestor of rice and corn (maize). Scientists also use fossil evidence in conjunction with atomic dating to start fixing the early descendants. Specifically they look at pollen fossils and for specific grass features (look for channels that go through the outer but not inner pollen walls). Earliest examples are found at 60-55 million years ago. They have found some examples of pollen from 70 million years ago, but they cannot confirm it actually comes from grass.

Your brief dinosaur history: Dinosaurs were the dominant land vertabrates from the late Triassic to late Cretaceous period - roughly 230-65.5 million years ago. Science generally points to several mass extinction events taking place at the end of hte Cretaceous period to kill off the dinosaurs and allow mammels to dominate. This later time is a time of thriving for dinosaurs, including the Tyrannosaur. And some mammels were around at this time. But you can see that with dinosaurs dying off in 65.5 million years from asteroids and/or volcanos, grass wasn't around according to the fossil and genetic record. So before 2004 scientists declared, "Dinosaurs did not eat grasses".

A type of titanosaur sauropod

But dinosaur poop saves the day! (Didn't expect that ever!) In 2005, a Science article discussed that they have found evidence of grasses in corprolites (the polite word for fossilized poop). Specifically they found that 5 different taxas (major species groups) of grasses were eaten by dinosaurs. (In this case titanosaur suaropods in India) This points to the fact that grasses were somewhat widespread and developed before the catastrophes of 65.5 million years ago.

A TV lie! He may have had the hammock, but not the lawn.

So...both sides are right. (Keep in mind the the exact dating and science here is a bit nebulous and often dependent on what we are lucky enough to find in someone's backyard). Grasses did exist to a good extent during the time of the dinosaurs, but not for the majority of the time. So Fred Flinstone didn't have to mow the lawn. How you settle the bet is up to you.

HRB

Chapping in the CAPTCHAs

2009-11-05T17:43:00.008-05:00

Q: Dear 100HB:

How come on some web sites to leave comments I only have to leave one set of silly characters and then on others I have to type in TWO sets of characters the second of which are OH so very difficult to decipher?

Yours Truly,

Spam the Man

A: Dear Slave to the Anti-Spam:

Could the real slim shady please stand up? No? Well, okay how about you just fill out this verification then?

The answer to your question is because you work for a man named Luis. That is right you are part of the great plan to mobilize the largest workforce in the history of mankind. Not getting paid? Well, you have Luis von Ahn to blame for that. If you are one of the 100 of millions of people who use the Internet (and if you are reading this you are) you have been working for Luis von Ahn for years...for free! So I called him to get some background and answers.

According to Luis, years ago Yahoo had a problem- SPAM. In an effort to gather a vast number of email accounts, Spammers were using automated computer programs to sign up for them. They were right programs to gather millions of Yahoo accounts everyday. Spam was clogging up Yahoo email accounts.

So Luis and his advisor Manuel Blum were approached to identify who was a person and who was an malicious automated computer program. They finally came up with a test. That is where the birth of the verification process called CAPTCHA.

The idea is that a human can discern the characters whereas computers cannot recognize the characters. Suddenly, the spam programs cannot gather accounts. Millions of companies including, YouTube, Gmail, Yahoo, MSN, Facebook, TicketMaster, Flickr, and NBC use CAPTCHA.

You would think with spam being reduced in every one's inbox Luis would be rejoicing at his success. Believe it or not Luis felt bad about this invention of his. When I spoke with him he let me know that he has estimated that for every CAPTCHA entry the average person is waisting 10 seconds of their time.

"If you were to multiply that by 200 million," Luis said, "you get that humanity as a whole is waisting 500,000 hours every day typing these annoying CAPTCHAS." This began to eat at him and he asked himself, "How could I better use this time? Is there a way to use this human effort in a way that benefits humanity?"

"I was on a mission to make good use of that 10 seconds of time," he says.

While hiding from the mass of Internet users upset at Luis's invention he got involved with another project, the initiative to scan books, decipher text and provide books over the Internet. Google has one, the Internet Archive has one but the problem is many books texts are old and faded. Type is not aligned, there are smudges and faded type as well. So when computers scan these old texts the computers don't recognize the text and converts 30-40% of the words incorrectly.

Solution? Take those words and use them as CAPTCHAs and have the people decipher them. But there in lied the problem. The computer could not decipher the word so how is the CAPTCHA test going to verify whether the person typing in the word got it right or not? Luis's solution was to combine the word from a book with a computer generated CAPTCHA.

"We will give two tests," says Luis, "One we know the answer to and the other that we don't and the person can solve the one we know the answer to them we will assume they can solve the one that we don't know the answer to."

He called it RECAPTCHA. Now every time you type a reCAPTCHA you are also transcribing an old book. It looks like this:
Today 125-150 books are being digitized a day because of RECAPTCHA. Even the New York Times archive are being transcribed this way. 130 years of newspaper archive is being transcribed from RECAPTCHA. Luis estimates that the NYT Internet archive will be complete next year with the help of RECAPTCHA.

"Now, we are taking that effort of 10 seconds and applying it to assist in the dissemination of literature, scientific text and social news," Luis states triumphantly.

Luis has done a lot with himself working as faculty at Carnegie Mellon University. But he tries to ensure his work is interesting to others. That is why he has founded GWAP (Games With A Purpose). In fact, I am sure you have all played one of his games, Google Image Labeler- pair up with another Internet user and try to identify matching labels for a picture. This data helps search engines refine search criteria and list more relevant and contextual results. GWAP has made games for the following:

Fighting Spam
Digitizing Books
Labelling Images on the web

So don't get too angry with yourself about those RECAPTCHAs. Just remember you are doing good for humanity. Yet, it begged the question, now that we all decipher two words is that not doubling our efforts to 20 seconds, Luis?

Also, Luis, could you establish a single sign on for the worldwide Internet?

I am sure your comments and questions Luis, are always invited on this Board (thanks for being a good sport).

Inquisitor of the Nauseating, Ghastly, Repulsive, Revolting so Called Candy

2009-10-29T11:43:00.006-04:00

Q: Dear 100HB:
Where do candy corns come from?

Sincerely,
Hal Louene

A: Dear Candy Cobbed Genesis:

First created in the 1880s by George Renninger of the Wunderle Candy Company, the three colors of candy corn are meant to symbolize actual corn. George Renninger came up with the idea to celebrate the unique food from the Americas but mostly because he was corny and vindictive. After all who else could possible invent something that looks like corn but tastes far worse and then call it candy? Each piece is approximately the size of a whole kernel of corn, as if it fell off a ripe or dried ear of corn. When candy corn first appeared, it was popular among farmers because of its agrarian look. They used the candy to fool pests into eating the candy rather than eating the farmers actual corn stock.

Candy corn is made primarily from sugar, corn syrup and honey. Working by hand, the original manufacturers first combined sugar, corn syrup and water and cooked them into a slurry. Fondant was added for texture, and marshmallows provided a soft bite. The final mixture was then heated and poured into shaped molds. Three passes were required during the pouring process, one for each colored section. Few changes have been made to the process or recipe.

Candy corn can be found at most popular grocery food stores in the United States. This is mostly due to the little known fact that candy corn is actually not manufactured anymore because it is not consumed anymore. That is right, NO ONE makes candy corn anymore. But you say, “they must I have some in my house right now”. Sure, just like everyone else.

The Goelitz Candy Company (now Jelly Belly Candy Company) started producing the confection in 1900. In 1952 Goelitz Candy Company found that kids in actuality don’t eat the bland tasting candy. At first this was due to a misunderstanding where kids thought that the candy corn was a candy version of the corns one gets on their feet. Since the candy had the same texture and taste the kids could not be blamed for their assumption.

In an effort to save on costs and be more environmentally friendly the company decided to send out representatives to simply collect all the unconsumed candy corn from people’s houses a week after Halloween. These remnants proved to be 98% of production that year. Goelitz’s research found that only a small population in Michigan was consuming 2% of their product while the rest went untouched- unconsumed.

One would think that George Renninger’s ancestors would be hurt by the news that no one in truth likes or even eats candy corn. But that is not the case. These brilliant entrepreneurs have been collecting candy corn remnants over the years, repackaging and selling them again for the next year. With the slashing in production costs, Goelitz has been raking it in since. According to the National Confectioners Association roughly 35 million pounds of candy corn will be "produced" this year.

But now the secret is out and we know that 35 million pounds of unconsumed candy corn are actually COLLECTED and recirculated out. That equates to nearly 9 billion pieces—enough to circle the moon nearly 21 times if laid end-to-end. The 100HB appreciates Goelitz's innovative business strategy modelled after the Treasury Department.

October 30th is National Candy Corn Day- this in no joke. So when you pick up a candy corn this week just think it may be as old as your grandpa.

Let me think...minus 9 months means...

2009-10-19T10:44:00.003-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

You have been busy 100 board, and i will add to your work load... i have a birthday coming up and this got me wondering, what month has the most birthdays celebrated in? thank you wise one...

Birthday Boy

A: Dear Spank Receiver (for your birthday and unnatural habit of not capitalizing your i's),

The 100 Hour Board most humbly apologizes for the delay in this answer. To our dismay, we have been stuck in a government archive digging out the information you requested. Unfortunately we were locked in one of the warehouses, and although we believe we saw the famed Ark of the Covenent, we did not relish our lengthy stay.

However, we have recovered some information for you. Hopefully you have not turned whatever you will turn this year yet, and we can assist in your celebratory exercises.

There are lots of answers on the internet regarding the most popular birth day and birth month. Many are not correct. Their sources are rather dubious. In fact I think you could pretty much pick any month by random (although not using 2, 6-sided dice as you will then only select months of Feb through Dec - although we can usually leave January out as a rather dull month will dull birthday kids) and supply a better answer. But the 100 Hour Board has come through again and given you the correct answer.

September!

But not by too much. First the information is hard to come by because the US Census buerau does not track births or birthdays, they leave that to the National Center for Health Statistics who are much more interested if you are born healthy and with 4 limbs than when exactly. (Actually there is a lot of data recorded by the NCHS and these results are confirmed by their data).

One website "Anybirthday.com" (a site providing a service whereby you can query any friend's or enemy's birthday just in case you need to send a present or order a credit card) uses a database of most states census records and birthdates. Although it isn't complete it is fairly concise. It points out that September is the lucky month. And January and February being unluckily lonely. (By the way they also point out that October 5th is the most common birth day.)

The NY Times summerized this research in a study that again points out that September is the most popular birth month.

Why you ask? I suppose we naturally turn towards excesses of egg-nog, idle time and frisky natures around Christmas. Yes September minus 9 months is December. Makes you wonder what people really mean when they sing the "Twelve Days of Christmas" and all those "lord's a leaping". And October 5th would point towards drunken hook-ups thanks to the ball dropping. This trend has been noticed since 1942 when the first reliable data tracking started.

However, September is a common birth month in non-Christian societies also - like India and Isreal. And in European countries they tend to favor the Spring. So it isn't just a proliference of Barry White music played over the Holidays.

Scientists are looking at other factors. (Here is one study that found that Crohn's disease is NOT related to the seasonality of birth date - for some of our interested readers.)

So, although the reasons are less certain - or perhaps varied (like based around Victoria Secrets sales or maybe due to temperature and length of the night...because no one except Canadians like to conceive in the snow) - we generally can assume that in the US there is something to that Holiday - unexplained birth 9 months later phenomenon. What you should really ask, is what month has the most unplanned pregnancies. My guess is still September. Although November 14th is a good guess.

The 100 Hour Board (not born in September!)
PS - Here is a great NY Times article from 1901 about the popularity of February as a birth month for famous people. Although I don't think we would consider Rose Terry Cooke famous nowadays. Although George Derby of New York vehemently disagrees in a follow-up letter-to-the-editor a bit later. Now you know what your great-grandparents did for fun. No wonder they had lots of September babies.

Bird On A Wire

2009-09-14T13:27:00.012-04:00

Q: Is it true that birds will sit on a wire to keep their feet warm?

Thanks,
Avian Fowl

A: Dear H5N1:

In answer to your question we went to Rocky Mountain Power company:

100HB: "I was hoping you could tell me why birds sit on your powerlines. It has been suggested that it keeps their feet warm. Is this true?"
RckPW: "I don't know. I've never heard of that. I guess if it is a hot day and the sun is keeping the wire hot. It is metal...I really don't know. I can tell you why they don't get electrocuted though."
100HB: "No, that is alright, just want to know about why they sit up there."
RckPW: "I think it is becuas they can see prey from up there."
100HB: "As apposed to the wood sections of your poles? I mean why the wire?"
RckPW: "I don't know. But they don't get electrocuted because..."
100HB: "Yes, yes, I know the second wire bit. I just need to know about why the wire."
RckPW: "Beats me."

Oh, I think we will beat you...I think we will.

I went and asked one of our professors in Natural Sciences- he wasn't too pleased with the question. He started going off on how a bird will lift one leg close to its body to keep it warm and how wires provide unabstructed views for hunting.

Wow, you're a REAL professor and everything? So impressive (sarcasm).

The wires contribute no heat themselves to the birds' feet. First we are talking about high power transition lines and not telephone wires. With telephone and cable wires they are insulated so you wouldn't get any heat if it let out any at all. Just feel your cable to your lamp or cable box. Is it hot? of course not.

Now high power transmission lines I read average about 7.2% loss across them, which means somewhere the lines are resisting and changing the electricity into heat. This is due to grounding and the corona effect - a blueish discharge of electricity more than just heat loss in resistence. But b/c aluminum alloys are used in transmission lines it is possible to have some heat. Heat loss to resistence is given by Q = I^2 x R (power loss = current ^2 times resistence) Resistence in aluminum is 0.248*10^-8, average current in line is 100-3000amps (high voltage means low current PV=I (power x voltage = current). This gives about .00558kW in power loss. Power x Time = Energy - so assume you lost ALL of that energy is lost to one bird foot in a second. That's 5.58 kWs or 5.58 Joules. 1 Joule can heat 1 gram of dry air 1 degree Celsius. You release 1 Joule in 1 hundredth of a second. 1 /100th of energy in one drop of beer. So it COULD heat up a bird's foot a very little bit, but I assumed all the heat came out in 1 second at one point. No the bird ain't getting warm.

The real answer most likely has to do with wires warmed in the sun over the day that have a heat from radiation effect. Like sitting on a warm sidewalk. MUCH MUCH more effect from that (magnitudes more). Add in a social, hunting, and need to sit down and raise a foot to keep warm - and you have a handy community perch.

Until the Disney researchers get back with me, the answer is for the birds:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s3IpOFsKcDQ

Whirling Johns

2009-09-10T21:27:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear All-Wise-100-Hr-Board,

I have heard (but have never traveled far enough to confirm) that when above the equator a toilet flushes in the opposite direction than from below the equator. Is this true?

If so, what occurs when you are located AT the equator?

Sincerely,
Flushed Away

A: Dear Swirly,

Who says they use toilets south of the equator? Or even AT the equator for that manner? Seeing as you have not traveled beyond the confines of your particular commodal region, you may not be aware what occurs in Australia. What do you think wombats are designed for? Which is why Tazmanian Devils are so very feared lest you confuse the two in the middle of the night. All of South America actually uses small buckets that magically teleport the...umm..leftovers to a specific septic tank in the 1000 Islands that magically needs extra pumping every year. And as you near the border, well...trophies are dried, shipped to Seattle and used as in high-price grande soy mocha latte.

We jest. Toilets in the Northern Hempisphere rotate counterclockwise, clockwise in the Southern. That is the whole toilet gets up and spins in only one direction. And then puts thier who selves in...their whole selves out... Ok...they flush in those respective directions. So at the border things just go straight down. Quickly. So watch the hands.

How do we know this? From watching hurricanes and cyclones that rotate similarly. Using deduction and gross-literary allegories we know that toilets behave similarly (gross...ha ha). What's good for the cyclones good for the crapper. If you know what I mean. I mean we give both of them men's names? Really...don't we consider the Gulf of Mexico our common WC? Coincidence? I think not.

Back in 1984 a group of MIT engineers and physicists undertook a NIS funded project to study this phenomena. Although fluid mechanics is central to engineers' studies (and essentially most civil engineers end up spending their career designing oversized toilet systems - HA BRIAN!), the real reason for the study arose from a debate on hair styling post swirlies. There was a worry that if an Aussie bloke gave you a swirlie while visiting a conference on Crocco effect in fluid dynamics (or a Star Trek convention Kirk) down under, you may not be able to adequately return to your 30 year old hairstyle. German nerds avoided this issue years ago by removing any toilet bowl and installing shelves. Trust me..I'll risk wet hair!

Surprisingly it was discovered that in fact the toilet bowls aren't large to come under the hyptonizing Coriolis effect. (Or that is, it is extremely neglibigle. Like spitting into the wind of a hurricane to mix analogies) The Coriolis effect is a 'fictional force' that is how straight movement on something rotating is perceived in another reference frame. Commonly we recognize this as air rotating in a low pressure storm - hurricane or cyclone (ruled by Buys-Ballot's law). Basically, hurricanes are huge and last around several days so the rotation of the earth effects the winds flowing towards the low pressure point to curve them. In the North you see this as counterclockwise storms, clockwise in the South. On the equator: nada - but only exactly there.

Turns out toilets, sinks, bathtubs (yes even jacuzzi tubs), swimming pools and the like are way too small to be effected or noticed. (Unless you live in a crapper).

"But my toilet swirls counterclockwise!" you say in consternation (NOT constipation). Well, the swirls are actually caused by the way the toilet flushes. Or small disturbances when the drain is plugged. So sorry, no dice. Toilets generally behave the same no matter the geography.

Although, in the 1930's British scientists did study the effect in bathtubs in very controlled experiments and found a very minimal effect to draining. Only the Brits have that much time on their hands. And week old bath water. Although we did watch a great video from 1961 of Ascher Shapiro demonstrating drains and how to calculate velocity vectors. But that's a little dry for most people. (Dry?!! We are too funny!) (In case you need to sleep watch the video Vorticity Part 1) More info here and here.

But this is ok. You won't believe what happens to toilets in Japan! Watch out! And of course I found this one that isn't about toilets flushing - but fun.

Sincerely,
Your WC Director

I Thought I Had An Idea

2009-08-26T15:13:00.005-04:00

Q: dear 100 board
i apologize for my absence, but i need an answer and i know of only one place to get the truth..... ok board a light bulb burns out, are we still using energy if the light switch is on even though our bulb has seen its last?... i appreciate your time oh wise 100!!

Pat

A: Oh Pat. Your absence is unexcused. The 100 Hour Board is aware of your departure and responsible for your light bulbs burning out.
The answer is yes and no. Or rather my favorite answer ever...it depends! Depends on what?
It depends on what kind of light bulb you have.

Light Bulb 101:

Light bulb technology is pretty intricate, cool and yet simple at the same time. Makes you respect Mr. Edison more.

Incandescent bulbs (old technology) work by sending a electrical current through a resistor, in this case thin tungsten coil filaments, that resist the flow of electricity and convert it into heat and some light. Only about 10% is visible which is why they are so inefficient. Normally the tungsten would catch on fire, so they fill the light bulb with argon or nitrogen. Over time the tungsten atoms fly off because the filament gets really hot - 4000 degrees! Like evaporation off water. The argon helps keep this from happening.

But over time, because of the tungsten leaving, and the constant on and off, rapid heating and cooling, the filament gets brittle and breaks. And your bulb burns out. Now an incandescent bulb can also fail because of vibration (filament breaks loose), glass breaking (argon leaves and filament catches fire), or the connection to the bulb and fixture is bad (that solder piece is deformed or the copper spring contact bends in - stemming from over tightening bulbs).

No matter which way it burns out, with incandescent bulbs, no electricity is flowing. The electrical circuit is broken. Like cutting your cord to the lamp. Which is why they are safe to leave in - no electric shocks from probing fingers.

BURNED OUT INCANDESCENT BULB = NO POWER

But fluorescent bulbs use a different principle to operate. A tube of argon coated in phosphor powder, is also filled with a little mercury. Electrodes at either end flow electrons through the plasma in the on tube and this causes gaseous mercury to release electrons and light. Although it releases ultraviolet light. The phosphor powder absorbs the UV and releases white light (or other colors depending on the powder). (I recommend looking at this page at How Stuff Works.)

These lights require a starting mechanism - usually what they call a ballast - that stores and releases energy at start-up. "Burning out" for fluorescent bulbs are less defined if they are not catastrophic (glass breaking) but can include issues with the electrodes, ballasts and leaks.

When fluorescent bulbs burn out it is possible to have electricity flowing through the tube but not igniting the mercury electron release. Also you can be sending electricity to the ballast all the time the switch is on. It could be a slow leak or even more to the ballast.

BURNED OUT FLUORESCENT BULB = SOME POWER

So not only do you need to worry about mercury spills and the EPA with a broken flourescent bulb, you need to worry about stray current! Oh my!
Hope that gives you some answers - or ideas to swallow for that matter:

100 HB
(Top photo courtesy of Josh Madison)

Confusing Cuisine

2009-08-02T10:06:00.002-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board
I read the ingredients of many foods I eat. Not one of them has made much sense to me. I don't remember ever learning about the chemicals listed on the back of food. Who is to say whether or not these may be cancerous? Where can I find information regarding the chemicals/ingredients of food?

Regards,
Stuck with sodium benzoate

A: Dear gastronomically, molecularly and masticatingly challenged,

Please repeat after me. "Chemicals are my friends. Chemicals are my friend." Take a deep breath.

Now that we are past that, we must realize that not all chemicals are evil, a grand consipracy, or disgusting. In fact most of them are quite helpful for you, some are helpful to the manufacturer and others are there to make food cheap and accessible. Modern food convenience, the freedom to eat a variety of interesting creations and cuisines, at prices that don't add to more than 50% of your income or 75% of your (a woman's) time, are due in part to these additions that drive down the cost of making and delivering safe food. But a lot of them aren't new. Man has been adding things to food to make them safe for years; salt, vinegar or even sulfer dioxide into wine to help control bad bacteria first added in Ancient Egypt).

But what are they? Food additives (the majority of all those chemicals on the ingredients' list) are either direct or indirect additiives. Direct additives are added to affect the actual food. Like adding niacin in wheat flour to make up for the loss of vitamins during milling. Indirect additives are leftovers from packaging, storing or making the food. For example calcium silicate (an inert salt that can't hurt you) is added to allow powders to flow in food plants. Direct additives serve one of three general purposes:

Maintain freshness and saftey: ie. so you don't get botulism or the product doesn't stale or dry out. This has direct relation to food risks and costs.
Improve or maintain nutrition: adding potassium iodine into table salt has been a medical marvel of our time - preventing severe thyroid issues.
Improve taste, texture and appearance: dyes for color, stabilizers so food don't seperate, starches for mouth feel, etc. A lot of these aren't new, but they help!

Now that we've firmly established the need and usefulness of additives, how do we know they are safe? In the United States (similar in most countries) food manufacturers must apply for the use of additives in food (both direct and indirect). The Food and Drug Administration then looks at the composition and chemical properties, focus on the amount you'll eat, any short and long-term health effects (especially cancer) and other various factors. They determine a safe level (which gives you a safety margin to consume a whole lot - just in case) and then regulate the use in the food. (Note: there are some items exempted from the process because we know they are safe - like GRAS - generally frecognized as safe). Are we absolutely sure its safe? NO. But we do our best. Combined with GMP (Good Manufacturing Practices) companies and the government look to deliver the best, and safest food possible.

Please note that the dangers these additions prevent are a MUCH MORE serious threat to your health than the 1 in 10,000 chance you have of being slightly sensitive to Yellow Dye #5. Botulism, samonella, e-coli, etc. are devastating diseases. So a little sodium erythorbate in your canned veggies can prevent that tiny amount of botulism that can kill you very fast (it takes a miniscule amount).

The FDA (and similar government groups) post online all the information you need to look up chemicals and determine their use. Start at www.fda.gov. There are search tools and tables. I'll give you some examples:

EDTA, BHA & BHT are all preservatives to keep food from spoiling or going rancid

Monosodium glutamate (MSG) is a SAFE way to add richness and flavors without their own flavor to change taste (this falls into the new taste on our tongues - savoriness).

Xanthan gum has many uses including a fat replacer and thickener to add texture.

Soy lecithin is an emulsifier - it keeps mixes of oils and waters together.

Sodium carobanate or citric acid keep the pH in control to prevent spoiling.

Glycerin retains moisture.

Ammonium sulfate strengthens dough effectively and at a lower cost for baked goods.

Calcium chloride (think similar to table salt) firms up foods - like veggies.

Having cooked directly with some of these pure chemicals, I can tell you they are useful and safe. Don't be afraid of them. But one note on general nutrition and food consumption. It is true that less processed foods are better - mostly because they retain a richer amount of nutrients and flavor than the processed kind - NOT because of these additives. I do recommend a homemade whole wheat bread, home killed, dressed and cooked meat and fresh garden veggies over alternatives. Pure foods are delicious and a delight. Do you have the time and ability for all those? When it comes to safe, effective and cheap food to keep us fed ALL year round, these additives are critical! And they are in EVERYTHING you eat - no matter if it is Green or Organic or not.

So bon appetit. Meanwhile I'm going to have a nice class of sodium benzoate with my soda.

The 100 Hour Board

Electircal Potential Differences...its all Voltage to Me

2009-07-16T14:48:00.007-04:00

Dear 100 (Day?) Board:

Q: Why does the United States use 110 voltage and Europe 220? And why the different plug system for them?

Sincerely,

220V A,L Plug

A: Dear Anti-Adapter,

In short, to answer your question laziness and unilateralism has caused the issues regarding inconsistent voltage, Hz and plugs not to mention that pesky metric system. To help you with the confusion visit the World-wide Electricity guide.

We have addressed these questions earlier with our brilliant article, Dirty Power Done Cheap. Your lack to adapt and understand previous answers is unfortunate. But because you are an ex-Pat it is almost a given that you will never fully adapt. For more detailed answers, well let us get started:

How values were selected
The type of electricity delivered to homes and businesses was first direct current (DC) but then changed to AC electricity. The standard voltage level started at 110V, went to 240V, back to 110V, and then to 220V. Voltage is just a fancy way to say, electrical potential differences. It is the force of electricity. The frequency started at 60Hz and then went to 50Hz in most areas simply because these frequencies were most efficient and optimal although it is argued 60Hz is better, faster and stronger... like the US.

Tesla starts AC
Early in the history of electricity, Thomas Edison's General Electric Company was distributing DC electricity at 110 volts in the United States and kicking every one's butt. Then Nikola Tesla devised a system of three-phase AC electricity at 240 volts. Three-phase meant that three alternating currents slightly out of phase were combined in order to even out the great variations in voltage occurring in AC electricity. He had calculated that 60 cycles per second or 60Hz was the most effective frequency. Tesla later compromised to reduce the voltage to 110 volts for safety reasons.

Europe goes to 50Hz
With the backing of the Westinghouse Company, Tesla's AC system became the standard in the United States. Meanwhile, the German company AEG started generating electricity and caught the fascist bug and became a virtual monopoly in Europe. They decided to use 50Hz instead of 60Hz to better fit their metric standards, but they kept the voltage at 110V.

Unfortunately, 50Hz AC has greater losses and is not as efficient as 60HZ. Due to the slower speed 50Hz electrical generators are 20% less effective than 60Hz generators. Electrical transmission at 50Hz is about 10-15% less efficient. 50Hz transformers require larger windings and 50Hz electric motors are less efficient than those meant to run at 60Hz. They are more costly to make to handle the electrical losses and the extra heat generated at the lower frequency. Those stupid fascists.

Europe goes to 220V
Europe stayed at 110V AC until the 1950s, just after World War II. They then switched over to 220V for better efficiency in electrical transmission. Great Britain not only switched to 220V, but they also changed from 60Hz to 50Hz to follow the European lead. Since many people did not yet have electrical appliances in Europe after the war, the change-over was not that expensive for them.

U.S. stays at 110V, 60Hz
The United States also considered converting to 220V for home use but felt it would be too costly, due to all the 110V electrical appliances people had. A compromise was made in the U.S. in that 220V would come into the house where it would be split to 110V to power most appliances. Certain household appliances such as the electric stove and electric clothes dryer would be powered at 220V.

Some countries can't decide on a standard.

This lack of standardization has caused multiple plugs and appliance prongs. I mean come on what do we even have a UN for?

But just think it could be worse. Just look at these countries:

Brazil
In Brazil, most states use between 110V and 127V AC electricity. But many hotels use 220V. In the capital Brasilia and in the northeast of the country, they mainly use 220-240V.

Japan
In Japan, they use the same voltage everywhere, but the frequency differs from region to region. Eastern Japan, which includes Tokyo, uses 50Hz. In western Japan, which includes Osaka and Kyoto, they use 60 Hz.

The reason for this is that after World War II, Britain was in charge of helping reconstruct Japan's electrical system in the eastern part of the country and the United States set up the electricity in the western part of Japan. Since Great Britain (United Kingdom) had been using 60Hz before the war and had just switched over to the European 240V 50Hz, it is strange that they set up Japan at 100V and 50Hz, especially when the U.S. was using 60Hz.

Having different voltages and frequencies within the country not only must be confusing for the people but also can result in extra costs for appliances and adapters. That MacArthur missed this is a mystery. Maybe he was preoccupied with his ever present personality.

Summary
The voltage and frequency of AC electricity varies from country to country throughout the world- it ain't changing anytime soon. No US or foreign president has had it on their platform for election/re-election. Most use 220V and 50Hz. About 20% of the countries use 110V and/or 60Hz to power their homes. 220V and 60Hz are the most efficient values, but only a few countries use that combination. The United States uses 110V and 60Hz AC electricity.

Turn Me Off or On?...It All Depends on How Long

2009-02-19T00:38:00.004-05:00

Q: Is it better to leave fluorescent bulbs on continually or turn them on and off as needed? Is there a time when it is more efficient to leave them off?

Sincerely,

In the Dark

A: Dear Dark Side:

Your question of efficiency is a good one. I would qualify the question by asking, is it better to leave fluorescent bulbs on continually or turn them on and off as needed as compared to what? If you are comparing a fluorescent bulb to an incandescent bulb than the answer would be yes in either situation. It would be more efficient to have fluorescent bulbs period.

So what is the difference between the two? A incandescent light bulb uses a thin tungsten filament that electricity runs through. Since the filament is thin it offers resistance to the electricity. This resistance turns electrical energy into heat. The heat turns the filament white hot which emits light. It also emits heat. This is highly inefficient. In fact only 10-15% of electricity that incandescent lights consume results in actual visible light.

A fluorescent bulb utilizes electrodes at both ends of a fluorescent tube. A gas mixture of argon and mercury vapor is pumped into the tube. When the light is switched on a stream of electrons flow from one electrode to the other passing through the mixed gas. The electrons bump into the mercury atoms and activate them. As the frenzied mercury atom slows its activity it emits off ultraviolet photons. The photons collide with phosphor that coats the inside fluorescent tube. This collision creates visible light. This process is 4-6 times more efficient than incandescent bulbs and produces less heat.

If your question is in comparison with the fluorescent bulb itself the question still needs to be qualified. How long will you be leaving a room? This is what makes all the difference. The process to emit light from a fluorescent bulb does take more energy upon the switch of a light as compared to leaving the light on. So wouldn't it be more efficient to just leave it on? Just like everything else in life the efficiencies of a fluorescent bulb have a break even point. So yes, there are times when it is more efficient to leave a fluorescent bulb but when doesn't seem to be agreed upon. Provided are recommendations as to when to turn the bulb off.

US Department of Energy: If you leave the room for more than 15 minutes
Consumer Energy Center: When leaving the room for more than 3-5 minutes
Myth Busters: When leaving the room for more than 23.3 seconds
Lighting Design Lab: When leaving a room for more than 15-20 minutes

But consider this:
According to the Arogonne National Laboratory, the energy needed to start a fluorescent lamp is not significantly higher than the energy needed to operate it. Even if we assume that a fluorescent lamp uses twice the normal amount of power during the starting phase, this phase lasts for only about 1 or 2 seconds. So, the crossover time to save energy would be less than 2 seconds.

And finally Scientific American recommends to always turn them off.

What you are really failing to ask yourself is the most important question regarding fluorescent bulbs. That question is, How does one make an authentic Star Wars light saber using fluorescent bulbs? Well, you can't unless you want to kill yourself or end up like those brits who put gasoline in fluorescent lights. You can try something a bit Safer however.

Can We All Just Get Along?

2008-12-23T08:50:00.005-05:00

Q: Perhaps the next question should be "Can we ALL get along?"

Regards,

Snarky 80

A: Dear "Accident"

In this wonderful time of year, the Holiday cheer, the message of Christmas and the desire to be warm to each other despite the chill outside, fills our hearts with depression. We want to share our love for one another, come together and be a little kinder. Some of us, hot chocolate kissing our lips, glitter spread across our kiesters, and fit into sweats to accommodate our expanding Holiday waist lines, take up the call to arms of Rodney King and ask if "can we all get along?"

And then that SUV cuts you off for the last parking space at the mall.

No.

We cannot all get along.

And there are three profound scientific reasons we cannot.

Phermones: Yes, those pesky little chemical triggers we release that inspire a natural response in other people. And I'm not talking about post-eggnog exhaust. There are the territorial markers that tell us to keep away or else. Which is why the 100 Hr Board has taken up marking the outside of our cars when we park in parking lots. All it takes is a couple of sodas. Just mind the frost. There are also epideictic pheramones that let other women know, "uh-uh you best not be touching my man and home. This is my crib girlfriend." (I think the chemical even does a little head shake too, while the extended molecular arm waves its chemical finger - so to speak). Of course there are sexual pheramones that start fights, scuffles, couch-sleeping and even inter-galactic war. It isn't the man's fault his head turns to look at a cute younger woman honey - chemistry made me do it. Releaser pheramones may even attract mates up to 2 miles away. Which explains the need for me to visit Quick Chek and eat a sausage-egg-cheese-hotsauce-breakfast sandwhich I am so attracted to. So, all those not-getting-along sessions can be attributed to pesky chemical markers. So next time you get someone angry or can't pick up a date - check your pheramones.

Pedigree Colapse: Why is it you don't have billions of ancestors, when the math suggests you should? Given the increase in ancestors when you start counting grandparents, and the lot of greats before them, you would think you had lots of fore-fathers. Something like 3 million around the black plague time. The thing is, as you move back you start getting common ancestors. For example, statistically 70% of those 3 million ancestors are really some of the same people. Your family tree actually looks more like a diamond. In short. You are inbred. We all are. And we are all related. Think of it as a giant family Thanksgiving dinner. No one can expect to make it to dessert before Uncle Buck starts a thermonuclear war over the last drumstick. Or Cousin Alice starts suicide bombing your sister about past bad-boyfriends. That pesky DNA (common DNA) will keep us from getting along. It's fate. Or rather genes.

Law and Order Reruns: Is it really a coincidence that there is a direct correlation between the number of Law and Order shows currently on TV (or in reruns) and the population growth? Or proportional with the increase in violence in the latter part and early part of the last 2 Centuries. Coincidence? Hardly. Current scientific study suggests that every time Robert Gorn of Criminal Intent makes a snarky comment, three cities in the world disappear off the face of the earth. If he tilts his head to the side, then you can also expect an earthquake in the region above a 7.0 on the Rhicter scale. It is also not widely known but the very relationship between Israel and the Arab Middle East hinges on the relationship between Elliot Staler and his on-again-off-again wife. Only until recently with the presidential campaign of red Thompson did people realize the profound effect on politics from the show. Elections are lost or won based on whether the jury at the end of an episode acquits. In fact, there is a persistent rumor in the scientific community that suggests that if the show ends without finding the killer (whether they are convicted or not), then there will be an invasion somewhere. And I think that tides are affected by Sam Waterston's tie choice. So you may not like the all day line-up of NY crime. But beware. Some think if you cancel it, a large black hole will open up in the earth's core. Of course some people think this is all hog wash and attribute all the same to CSI. There is something to be said about Horatio Cae's sun glasses and global warming.

So - to answer your question. No we cannot just get along. With things like floating chemical lures that AKE me look at her butt out there, unending L&O reruns that drive a man insane and cause mass murder, or the fact that I'm related to boss in some distant way will force us to always fight and argue.

There is one bright spot though. One cure out there. It comes from a much maligned, holiday film staring a recently displaced man raised by elves who walked throught the 7 layers of the candy cane forest and through the Lincoln Tunnel. Yes, Elf. It is known as the Code of the Elvs:
1. Treat Every Day Like Christmas.

2. There's Room For Everyone on the ice List.

3. The Best Way to Spread Christmas Ceer is Singing Loud for All to Hear.

There is hope after all. Thanks Budddy!

100 HRB

iTunes, uTunes We All Tunes for iPods

2008-12-16T17:14:00.010-05:00

Q: Dear 100HRB

How does one get their own podcast on iTunes?

Sincerely,
Pod Dweller

A: Dear Media Prima Donna:

Wait, your asking questions now? Well as the 1/2 of 100 HRB has already made clear readers (and contributors) should, "answer their own D$#@ quesiton(s)". But this 1/2 (who happens to be pulling the load) is far kinder, gentler, more handsome and manly. A true man doesn't curse (hopefully this will be catalyst enough to get the other 1/2 to post on his own blog).

But I digress. First let us define what is a podcast. Unless you have been living in a cave for the past five years you will know that a podcast is a video or audio series that is downloadable from iTunes and plays on either your MP3 device or computer. You can subscribe to podcasts so that new episodes are automatically downloaded on your iTunes player. Some are free and some have a fee associated with them. Podcasts do not play under shuffles. They are treated as separate than music files. Considering that Apple sold 1.2 billion iPods this year alone, distribution through iTunes seems the way to go. But it all depends on what you want to do.

So you think that you have some wonderful content to provide for iTunes Podcasters? The first thing you need to do is create recordings. As large as Apple company is they do not support the creation of podcasts from content owners. A simple and free download for audio recording software is Audacity. If you are creating a video podcast you may want to look into Quicktime 7 Pro.

Once you have created your recording you will need to host the file on a web-server with an RSS feed. If your podcast is apt to be wonderful you had better have a lot of money. Supporting many downloads to your Podcast requires a lot of server space. Server space costs a lot of money. WBEZ Chicago Public Radio pays about $104,000 per year just to pay for server space which enables millions of users to download the free This American Life podcast. I can think of many good podcasts (Fair Game) that went under simply because of lack of funding.

Finally, you need to submit your RSS web address to the iTunes Store. Apple would like to make this sound very easy but in actuality this submission is more of an application. To become a content provider you must complete the iTunes Online Application. So fill out the application and wait for a couple of years until some poor intern actually fields your request. Once you are a signed content provider you can set the price of your Podcast. Just beware- since iTunes is a behemoth distributor their share of sales is 30 cents for every dollar spent. Even Hollywood labor unions have fought with iTunes for a greater royalty when actors, directors and writers works are downloaded from iTunes...the union lost. iTunes lives and breathes by one-third of the buyers who account for 80 percent of revenues, according to Josh Bernoff of Forrester Research. So it isn't as though you can charge a lot otherwise demand will go down.

If your podcast is picking up speed faster than you can support server space you may want to outsource your server. In addition, you may want to procure the services of Podcast marketing specialists like Podtrac or comScore.

iTunes reports having over 100,000 requests for content to be distributed by them each week. I think what you will find is that getting your stuff out there is easy. Distributing it in such a way that it rises above the billions of other content is the difficult part (just ask 100HRB). Marketplace International, another great podcast, did a study and found that everything on iTunes has a market. Meaning, every piece of content distributed by iTunes has been downloaded or purchased by someone. So at least you know you will have one person interested in your podcast.

The Dark Side: Matters of Darkest Dark

2008-12-03T19:18:00.007-05:00

Q: What does Dark Matter look like?

Brown Dwarf

A: Dear MACHO:

Well, I am not a scientist. The closest I come is a social scientist and even then...a poor one. To that end...the 100HB's colleagues were supposed to answer this insidious question.

Your question is only the surface of deeper questions, such as, “What is Dark Matter?”, "How does one find it?", and "What is the purpose of Dark Matter?". I am glad you are so inquisitive- you must have a striking intellect.

The name ‘dark matter’ is given to the amount of mass whose existence is deduced from the analysis of galaxy rotation curves but which until now, has escaped detections. NASA’s Wilkinson Microwave Anisotropy Prove (WMAP) reveals that dark matter comprises 23% of the universe.

Dark Matters properties are as follows (and as argued):

Does not emit light
Does not absorb light
Can be detected indirectly by its gravity
Is invisible

So in answer to your questions as to what does it look like- invisible. Which only makes sense when you discover that while attempting to create the new invisibility cloak, researchers at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute and Rice University managed to create the darkest material ever made by man (0.045% reflection which beats out the current 1.4%). That is “Dark Matter”.
Scientifically, if one were to accept the Big Bang Theory, one would have to agree that something (or someone) organized matter to form the galaxies. Our galaxy is the Milky Way. The Milky Way contains about 100 billion stars. On still larger scales, individual galaxies are concentrated into groups, or what astronomers call clusters of galaxies. These all had to be organized. But by what? Some would argue God. Some would argue dark matter. The force, or glue, that holds the cluster together is gravity -- the mutual attraction of everything in the Universe for everything else. The space between galaxies in clusters is filled with a hot gas. In fact, the gas is so hot (tens of millions of degrees!) that it shines in X-rays instead of visible light. By studying the distribution and temperature of the hot gas we can measure how much it is being squeezed by the force of gravity from all the material in the cluster. This allows scientists to determine how much total material (matter) there is in that part of space.

Remarkably, it turns out there is five times more material in clusters of galaxies than we would expect from the galaxies and hot gas we can see. Most of the stuff in clusters of galaxies is invisible and, since these are the largest structures in the Universe held together by gravity, scientists then conclude that most of the matter in the entire Universe is invisible. This invisible stuff is called 'dark matter'. Current research is using the identification of dark matter in hopes to locate Black Holes. Dr. Prisin Chen of the Stanford Linear Accelerator center says:

"If a sufficient amount of small black holes can be produced in the early Universe, then the resultant remnants, which are stable and interact only through gravity, can be an interesting candidate for dark matter."

According to Nasa, there is currently much ongoing research by scientists attempting to discover exactly what this dark matter is, how much there is, and what effect it may have on the future of the Universe as a whole. In short…no one knows but God.

PS - By the other colleague:
The 100 Hour Board encourages self-discovery and self-learning (ie finding out yourself, and not just discovering, yes indeed you have an arm on the left side). For this reason 1/2 of the board has directed the other 1/2 to answer their own D$#@ quesiton.
And to good results. Excellent presentation of the facts and understanding in science. Some quick notes.
All of this must be framed in the light (ha ha) that all science is theory, and usually (esp in physics) a way to mathematically conform reality (observation) to a model. What fits. For example the entanglement effect (think quantum teleporation) was first predicted mathmatically than proven. String theory is just a series of math proofs. So dark matter and energy are essentially solutions to a very VERY long math problem.
We also "see" dark matter by the way we see objects. That is the dark matter deflects actual positions of matter into an Einstein ring.
All of this (and a really cool experiment you can try at home to "see" what Einstein rings look like - minute 6:45 on) is best explained by a fantastic video from TED by Patricia Burchat. I encourage you to view. Here is also the link.

We encourage you to check out TED more.

Let's Scream All Together!

2008-09-22T20:13:00.005-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

What is the most popular ice cream in the United States?

Brain & Freeze

A: Dear Cookies N Creme,

As my grandfather says. "They should make a statue to the man who invented ice cream. Think about how much happiness he has brought to the world." Ah, yes. But what flavor should it be?

There are sooo many flavors out there. It is tough to decide (unless you are presented with trout ice cream, as made in Iron Chef America). We for one are ready to punt those little kids aside so that we can get to the front of the ice cream truck line.

The answer is simple: vanilla. Let's show you with a little more information. (Data from the International Ice Cream Association in Washington DC).

The first pie chart (a good choice with a big scoop of ice cream!) shows all the favorite flavors. (Ours is in the 'other' category).

The second pie chart (this one rhubarb and strawberry) shows the generic categories. Both show vanilla as king!

Now, as this was an easy answer - anyone who's dropped a delicious scoop of vanilla into cold root beer understands - we offer you some more interesting facts.

The leaders in ice cream consumption: 1 US 2 New Zealand 3 Denmark 4 Australia (per capita).

In the US the mid-northern states eat the most ~42 quarts / person / year. (Average is 23.2 quarts). With Portland, St. Louis and Seattle being the winners (nothing better to do).

Ages 2 through 12 and over 45 eat the most. And 98% of homes buy ice cream.

Some odd flavors are out there, so watch out. Although most of these are in Asia and a single store in Venezuela (500+ flavors). Some include: a whole variety of fish flavors (shark, eel, squid, etc.), corn, chicken wing (if it was buffalo w/ blue cheese swirls I'm game), viagra (just what we need, fat old excited men), garlic, bacon and spaghetti bolognese. 101 found here.

But Ben & Jerry's - a truly loved ice cream provider (or as we say, a packager of love) - gives you a tool to make your own ice cream. With 4 steps and many options the varietes are endless (actually there are exactly 155,999,692,800 varieties).

And one last fact. Sorbets and ices have been around for a while, some believe Marco Polo brought it along from China (along with pasta). But true 'ice cream' showed up in the US around 1715. Is it any wonder that the US has been around as long as ice cream. We at the 100 Hour Board suggest that the Constitution, the Revolution and the United States democracy all came because of the creation of ice cream. Jefferson and Madison loved it. I think you can even see a chocolate ice cream stain on the Declaration of Independence. And why did the British really loose? Brain Freeze. Some call it Divine guidance. We call it Delicious goodness.

100 Hour Board

PS - Some 100HB favorites: basil ice cream w/ virgin olive oil, sorbets of all sorts, spaghetti ice cream (vanilla 'noodles' w/ strawberry sauce and coconut shavings), Graeters!, peanut butter in almost any way.

Licking the Salt Stone

2008-09-20T22:03:00.004-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why does watermelon taste sweeter when you put salt on it?

Georgia Inquisitive

A: Dear Peachy Keen on an Answer,

People do a lot of things with their watermelon. Some better than others. They eat it. Pickle the rinds. Cut into wedges, squares, balls and strips. Juice it. Salt it. Some even (so we've heard) drill a hole in it and pour libations therein. (The 100 Hour Board loves to shave it in thin slices and serve with cucumber slices with prosciutto and lemon olive oil. But we digress). We've even seen pictures of little kids with watermelon that is worn rather than eaten.

But why salt it?

The 100 Hour Board - in our infinite wisdom - will tell you the reasons, both the simple, the most likely and the probable. So sit back with a slice of pink and green, pull up a can for spittin' seeds and enjoy. (Just don't spill on the keyboard. IBM doesn't like the sticky keys.)

The short answer - salt doesn't make your watermelon sweeter, just seem that way. It works too with all sorts of fruits, especially: tomatoes, melons, pineapple, mangoes, papayas and even wine (again - so we hear). We'll give you the top three reason this works.

Seasoning. Salt is the ultimate season. (that's as seasoning not spring or fall) As a primary taste (along with sweet, bitter, sour and umami - the newly found one) it adds depth to things we eat. For a long time it was thought we had individual taste buds for each taste type. But currently, "electrophysiological evidence indicates that although some cells are especially responsive to specific types of stimulus, they also respond to other taste stimuli to varying degrees as well." To quote a recent cartoon rat. Think of taste like music, with each taste a layer that works in harmony to make a symphony. Salt is like a major bass note - supports a whole lot to make things tasty. Add a little salt, and things taste better. A little more and the full flavors come really out. A little more and it begins to get salty. Balance is the key. So a little salt on that melon will enhance the flavor as it plucks the strings of your taste bud.

Vacuoles. Plant cells contain little pockets inside that act as little storage depots. Some are temporary garbage dumps. In plants, they can be 90% of the volume in the cell. Plant vacuoles, especially in fruit cells designed to be tasty and enticing, are full of the sweet nectar we animals love. All those complex flavours, acids and the like fill those delicious bubbles. As we eat, these burst inside cells and fill our mouth with acids, sugars and other chemicals. The idea is that when we add salt, osmotic pressures (more salt on one side of the cell wall, can help lyse - break or drive out - the flavourful liquid. Thus the fruit is oozing with goodness sooner in the tasting process - before we need to chew it up. This is much like a fruit ripening and beginning to decompose to be tastier.

Balance. This is a little more touchy a reason - but important. We talked about strings on the taste chord. But balancing the sweet - sour, bitter - sweet, salty - acid, etc. balances are important. Fruits really need to get the sour/sweet thing right. In fact there is a lot of sour in unripe fruits to keep you away from them until they are ready. Then out comes the sweet big time. It seems that fruits with especially high sugar to acid ratios (a lot more sugar than acid) are well suited to salting. These include (with their ratio) grapes (80), melons (40-50), bananas (60), papaya (80) and even cactus pear (110). But there are exceptions: pineapple (6), strawberries (6) and grapefruit (8) which are served well by a salting - which may point to a different balance salt helps find. (Too much sugar or too little). Maybe that is why we typically leave apples (13), peaches (25) and plums (17) alone.

Odd mixes of chemicals really can bring out the best of tastes. Salt is just the beginning. So keep on eating melon with a shaker my friend. And open your melon mind to try it out on a couple other things. But don't be afraid of other things. Pure cocoa in a tomato sauce for example really helps bring out that non-acidic or sweet tomato flavour (umami! like glutamate).

A very hungry 100 Hour Board

Don't Be Such a QWERTY!

2008-09-17T17:35:00.009-04:00

Q: Dear 100HRB,

Is it true that you can mathematically type faster and more acurate using the Dvorak key configuration on the keyboard?

Sincerely,

Christopher Sholes

A: Dear Stuck in the QWERTY:

Your typical computer these days comes with a keyboard with a preconfigured key settings with the exception of a few keys that have been added for modern day use. Namely, your settings are the QWERT settings established in 1874.

Where does this name come from? Look down at your keyboard and you will see at the top left hand corner where the letters begin the sequence, QWERTY. This layout was designed to make it easier to find letters. If you look down at your keyboard right now you will see that FGHJKL are all together. This is the same sequence as the alphabet. This was supposedly "easier" for configuration of the type writer mechanics not the typist. If you have ever used an old type writer you know about those swinging arms that pull up and hit the paper to mark the letter. The problem was, how do you configure a keyboard to type without crossing those letter hamers on the typewriter? QWERTY solved that issue. But typewriters are no longer used and the mechanics issue was resolved through ribbon cartridge technology.

Thus there was a need for Dr. August Dvorak to make a name for himself by developing and testing a new keyboard configuration. According to Dvorak research he found that after 3 years of typing instruction prior to WWII using the QWERTY method typists could type 47 net words per minute (NWPM). In 1944 the US Navy let Dvorak do some research on 14 typists to see what results he could get. Three years wasn't a good turn around for the Navy. Dvorak could train in 52 hours with speeds that were 74 percent faster and 68 percent more accurate. However to this day there is speculation as to whether these findings were fabricated.

If you are so inclined to try the Dvorak keyboard layout you can go to Microsoft's Keyboard website and download different keyboard layouts for two handed or single handed typists. This is pretty cool stuff. I mean what if you lost a hand? Thankfully you can download a configuration that enables you to type one handed. You will see Dvorak layouts with tutorials as to how to select the layout. You can switch it off and on using XP. So it might be worth the try for you.

Once downloaded you can also run through some practice modules.

But I guess the question is why do we still use the QWERTY method? There is a theory that argues that market winners will only by the sheerest of coincidences be the best of the available alternatives. By this theory, the first technology that attracts development, the first standard that attracts adopters, or the first product that attracts consumers will tend to have an insurmountable advantage, even over superior rivals that happen to come along later. Hmmm, 100HRB has to give this theory more thought. It is very bright news for the groundbreakers. So if your self toothpaste dispensing toothbrush invention is sitting in the garage you might want to be first to market.

Of interest is that the term QWERTY is sometimes used to refer to designs, ideas, or practices that had a historic origin in a technological limitation, became established practice, and have persisted as an anachronism long past the time of their utility.

Would You Like Fries with That?

2008-09-15T15:14:00.010-04:00

Q: Dear 100HRB:

For being America's fast food restaurant...why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs?

Yours Truly,

Frankfurter

A: Dear Insoluble Inquirer:

In order to get your answer the 100HRB contacted McDonald's Corporation Customer Service located in Peoria, IL. Not too far from the corporate headquarters in Oak Brook, IL.

McD: I’ve got an answer for that… (you can hear Jackie typing in an inquiry to whatever form of Mc Google they use for questions) McDonald’s feels that their form of business in hamburgers & chicken and their wonderfully new salads provides a unique nutrition solution. (Wow- not only did the McD’s Google give me an answer it gave me a sales pitch for wonderfully new salads.)
100HRB: Are the new salads wonderful or are they just wonderfully new?
McD: What do you mean?
100HRB: I mean, are you not saying that it is just wonderful that they are new and in actuality taste like crap? Or are they wonderful to eat?
McD: Both.
100HRB: They taste like crap and and crap is wonderful to eat?!
McD: No, no (laughing). Are you doing this on purpose?
100HRB: What?
McD: Changing my words?
100HRB: I haven’t changed anything. I just want to know the answer.
McD: Well, they are wonderfully new and wonderfully delicious.
100HRB: Okay, if you say so. I’ll give you this one. (in order to be perceived as authoritative I make some keystrokes of my own and ensure that the McCorporate lady hears it) I guess my concern is that my question was on the premise that McDonald’s Corporation is the fast food king. Is McDonald’s new fascination with salads and healthy nutrition solutions a message to the world that McDonald’s is relinquishing its throne to…I don’t know say to Burger King.
McD: McDonald’s is proud of being the number one convenient food restaurant of choice by people around the world.
100HRB: Is the name Burger King a misnomer?
McD: Other chains have every right to claim their own name.
100HRB: But not the position of King in the…what did you call it? Convenient food market? Look, all I am saying is that this new focus kills any future of having an old fashion American hot dog. Tell me straight, is or is not Ronald McDonald afraid of Nathan’s?
McD: I am not sure what Nathan’s is.
100HRB: Oh, you are not sure are you? Nathan’s! It is a fast food chain that serves hotdogs, corn dogs and fries. You can get sauerkraut, mustard, olives, chili, relish anything you really want on top of a good old fashion dog. (obviously she deliberately stalled the 100HRB since as I am answering I can here the clickety clack of her keyboard) But they fail to provide me with the ever important question after ordering a hot dog, ‘Would you like fries with that?’. I just want to hear it at my local McDonald’s. What is wrong with that?
McD: Unless we are talking about one of our specialty stores like the ones in Walmart, McDonald’s has no future plans to add hot dogs to our menu selection.
100HRB: Ah, finally some answers from your secret vault. Tell me more about these so called, ‘specialty stores’.
McD: McDonald’s has partnered with Walmart and other local supermarket stores in offering McDonald’s food to customers who come to shop. At select stores we offer hot dogs.
100HRB: Boiled or baked?
McD: I believe they use a spit or something like you would see at a Seven Eleven.
100HRB: Is this in response to the Polish hotdogs that Costco offers?
McD: Our specialty locations are there to serve the customer in a convenient location with convenient choices.
100HRB: Is the hamburger not convenient enough?
McD: Hamburger’s our McDonald’s number one product.
100HRB: Enough about the hamburger; please stay on topic. Are these so called hot dogs you serve at the specialty locations polish dogs or more like Ballparks?
McD: I think they are just a regular hot dog.
100HRB: Is it not true that McDonald’s is afraid of the Polish? Or at least any form of Kraut?
(I can hear more typing on that insane computer! As though this question demands a McGoogle search.)
McD: We are happy to be located in Warsaw. For questions or comments regarding McDonald's outside the USA please feel free to contact our Global Trade Center in Warsaw at 48-22-874-4303.
100HRB: Oh, I will. Believe me, I will.

Anyone have a over seas phone plan?

Truth is that Dick and Mac McDonald's Restaurant, in San Bernardino, California was the first McDonald's. And it DID offer hotdogs. To make a long story short...in 1954 Ray Croc came around and began selling franchises across the nation and ripped* Dick and Mac off. In Ray Croc's desire to streamline everything hotdogs were taken off the menu. It is obvious that the question brings up a shady history of aggressive business practices that McDonald's Corporation would like to cover up. The hotdog can lead to the smoking gun that is known as Ray Croc.

*Ray Croc bought the McDonald's franchise from Dick and Mac. Ray even opened a McDonald's across the street from the original McDonald's in San Bernardino. Then Ray had the nerve to sue Dick and Mac for name infringement. The court ruled that since McDonald's was Dick and Mac's given name they had a right to use it. Four years later, Ray's McDonald's in San Bernardino competed so hard that it forced Dick and Mac to close shop for good.

Come On Do the Locomotion with Me!

2008-08-26T10:15:00.006-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

Why can't particular bugs go backwards?

Pain in the Thorax

A: Dear Phylum Arthropoda:

Terrestrial locomotion has come a long way...at least for most of us. Humans and many other animals can readily walk forward or backward. In insects, the nervous system changes the effects of sense organs that signal forces on a leg when the direction of walking is reversed. The short answer is that insects can walk backward if given the correct signal to their little brains.

In legged locomotor systems, sensory input signaling leg displacement and force or strain to central neuronal networks is pivotal for generating functional walking motor outputs.

The cockroach has a set of pattern generators that control the motion of each leg, which are coupled together to produce the alternating motion of left and right legs. For the animal to walk, however, these interconnected central pattern generators (CPGs as those bug nut cases like to term them) must be modulated to allow different stride lengths in each leg, different swing heights to step over obstacles, and so on. It takes a complex system of modulating CPGs to enable a cockroach to walk backward.

Poor insects have 3 things against them in terms of successful backward walking:

In proper/Inefficient sensory input signals to the leg- too many modulating CPGs to process
Exoskeletons- flexibility, stride and gate are all dependent on the exoskeletal structure
More than two legs- each leg has it's own CPG thus multiplying the processing required to walk.

These factors contribute to the difficulty of insects walking backwards. But it can be done. Scientists have influenced the sensory input signals in insects to modify their walking behavior. For instance, scientist who had nothing better to do with their time apparently successfully had a stick insect walk backwards by simply grabbing the insects antennae (Segment Specificity of Load Signal Processing Depends on Walking Direction in the Stick Insect Leg Muscle Control System, Journal of Neuroscience).

But even cooler (oh no, I am becoming an insect freak) is that specific to cockroaches, when in a fight or flight situation they always choose flight and in order to escape with speed the cockroach will run on their hind legs. Putting aside the human evolution implications of this fact, this demonstrates that the in order for the cockroach to run with a specific velocity it must reduce the number of CPGs to process- thus using only two legs rather than all legs. Suddenly, the evolution of Insect Ranger doesn't seem so rediculous.

This type of evolution is not just specific to insects. Believe it or not Michael Jackson's famed 1983 "moonwalk" proves that human evolution still exists to this day! That's right friend, in terms of terrestrial walking Michael is the one to beat. The moonwalk is a highly adapted stepping pattern. His ability to give a convincing impression of forward walking, while actually moving backward, apparently took many hundreds of hours of practice, and shows that the basic kinematic pattern of leg movements can be almost completely inverted, generating ground forces with the bent leg, while sliding the apparently supporting leg over the ground. So lesson learned- if you want to get the girl (in Michael's case I think it is a little boy) you must learn and apply physics in your gate. But this also proves that we as humans have not entirely discovered all that we can do with just our walk alone. And that is exhilarating!

You Can Say That Again...You Can Say That Again

2008-08-24T16:02:00.003-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

Why do "identical" twins have different finger prints?- Not so identical are they?

Irish Twin

A: Dear Celtic Brother,

Having an identical twin certainly does have its benefits: a free friend, an automatic transplant organ source, and a diabolical crime partner. Imagine you rob a bank, or knock-off somebody, and can blame it on your twin. The jury would never know who really committed the crime - and given just DNA evidence - either would Grissolm or the CSI team (no matter how much Prada they wear)! But if you left a fingerprint, it is true, the coppers could tell you apart from your twin. (Or if you have an identifiable tattoo that leads an eyewitness to correctly pick you apart).

Now, if you're being that nitty-gritty about it, identical twins don't exactly have the same DNA. They start out with the same zygoate (single fertilized egg) that splits: so on Day 1 they have the same genetics. But over time the environment inside the womb - and eventually outside - will change the DNA. Even naturally occurring mistakes in gene translation will cause differences. But things like different temperatures, blood flow, food, nutrients, position, etc in the womb can change the genes. Heck, DNA isn't even the same in all parts of your body. (Dr Starr, Stanford U)

Fingerprints are an amplified piece of this puzzle. The pattern of whorls, arches, loops are dermal ridges which are at first determined by genetic code in the baby. Around the 13th week of pregnancy the baby develops these, however immediately they are changed and influenced by the surroundings - ie. mother. Touching the amniotic sac, their face, what they eat, etc. changes the patterns slightly. But the changes are dramatically amplified in the patterns we see and therefore offer a distinguishing feature between twins.

Identical twins, similarly, aren't that identical when born. Their other features and genetics have the same influence of environment. This is all referred to as phenotype - the way we or species look. Genotype (DNA) + environment + random variables = Phenotype.

So yes. That extra helping of General Zhaos chicken when you are preggo could make your kid's fingerprints randomly closer to a mass murderer. You never know.

100 Hour Board

Oh and PS: Chance of having twins 1:40, identical twins 1:240, spontaneous fraternal twins 1:60, two sets of fraternal twins 1:5

Dirty Power Done Cheep

2008-08-04T15:22:00.005-04:00

Q: Dear 100hrb

Why and how is European electricy different than US?

Regards,

Frazzled Expatriot

A: Dear Electric Slide Fanatic:

So you’re in Europe stuck on the highway to hell with no outlet to charge your iPod? Maybe Angus or Malcolm Young can help you out. Their “High Voltage” music can spark the energy into anyone, including that maniac Bon Scott. And that is where AC/DC come from. Alternating assaults of the Young brother’s guitars and the direct hard-living, hard-loving, hard-playing wild-eyed rabble-rousing singer, Bon Scott. Electricity can flow continuously in one direction (direct current, DC) or it can be reversed on a regular basis (alternating current, AC).

Just remind your self that AC is the schoolboy-in-knickers, Angus Young. Respectable and American (well not quite but use your imagination).

DC is your half dressed wild-eyed Scotsman Bon Scott. Euro trash.

Easy to understand the difference now? Good. Now let’s see if we can distinguish why you can’t plug that iPod in. Converting European electricity so that it can be used in your American appliances is a significant nuisance but it can be done.

Lighting it up in America
Your local utility company provides your household in the United States with 110 to 120 volts (force of electricity) and 60 Hz (frequency per second that the AC current reverses direction). This considered safer. It is lower voltage with a higher frequency of hertz. But America took it a step further and backed up fuses that are prone to being blown out with circuit breakers. A circuit breaker switch automatically opens when too much power is being used. When the switch opens the flow of electricity is shut of. Thus your 1,000 watt hair dryer may only shut off while using it. When the cause of the excessive power is resolved the circuit breaker will reset. Thus you can turn that hair dryer back on until the circuit breaker turns it off again.

Exploding in Europe
Europeans who are so tired of Americans being better at everything have decided that they will show America up when it comes to voltage. Electricity in Europe is supplied at 230 volts and 50 Hz. This means more power with less alternating currents. Danger Will Robinson! So it only makes sense that when you decide to use that 1,000 watt (electrical power used) hair dryer the lights will start to flicker and if not shut off it will blow a fuse. After all you are driving a lot of energy toward that one appliance with high voltage and low hertz. To top it off there are no circuit breakers within the electrical infrastructure in Europe. That means your hair dryer will fry or worse you will get electrocuted prior to you even knowing that you were using excessive power. But Europe hopes to combat these dangers with what you ask…well heaven forbid they use circuit breakers…no they want to build more, smaller grids to serve communities and shut down when excessive power exists. In truth it is like a circuit breaker just for the community not in your house. To read more go to http://www.smartgrids.eu/documents/vision.pdf-.

That is the difference- so get a 50 watt transformer for low wattage devices (iPod) and a small converter for high power appliances (television). Finally, don’t even bother hooking up an American electric clock in Europe. Generally, these clocks run on AC motors and will run at 5/6 the speed since the speed is determined by electric frequency. In other words if you set an American clock up in Europe and set it to 6 PM when you go check it in the morning it may read 4 AM when in actuality it is 6 AM.

For those about to rock we solute you, keep a stiff upper lip and continue those dirty deeds. Other wise if you want to know the power of electricity...go fly a kite!

You've Got Mail...Again

2008-07-28T22:10:00.004-04:00

Q: Dear e-Filer of Knowledge,

From old people jokes to pictures of Obama not pledging allegiance to the flag...where do forward e-mails originate from? Who sits down and decides, "I'm going to create this e-mail that will be forwarded across the world"?

From,

Over-stuffed inbox

A: Dear overwhelmed, oversold, overpitched and overemailed patron of the 100 Hour Board,

There are three main theories attributed to the source of most email forwards, and it is up to the reader (or the 100 HB's bottomless well of knowledge) to find the answer.

The emails all originate from sham companies in Nigeria. If you've ever received an email addressed to "Dear most honorable sir" regarding hidden funds, inherited wealth and a need to wire money you know what we're talking about. Given the shear volume of these emails, it is quite possible all email forwards come from Dr Klement Okon III esquire.
Emails may or may not be true, but are generated by the Syndicate (the secret government ala X-Files) as an elaborate mass-information / disinformation campaign to generate public interest, concern or to drive policies. This leads to a lot of unclear political and corporate information. Although it may be hard to imagine why a shadow government hiding the arrival of extra-terrestrials are interested in the size of any one's...umm.."endowment".
Irma Walton of Ft Lauderdale, Florida. Although that is her alias. But if you happen to be on a certain Aunt's email list - you know what I'm talking about.

On a more serious (ok factual note), your question depends on the content. Of course a lot of scams originate from specific countries (and yes Nigeria tops that list), but scams actually share a lot in common with other emails. They are nothing new. the 419 Nigerian scams began as letters, telexes and faxes long before email became ubiquitous. And a lot of forwards describing laws, companies, politicians, sick people, photos, are old (really old) urban legends or hoaxes that have found new life in the internet age. A quick look at snopes.com will lead the reader to a good number of histories and authentications of these emails.

Even a lot of the political junk we hear about politicians are just recycled, yesterday's news. Some reach back to the muckraker's days. Of course a lot of things are new, and the majority is fake - or at least largely taken out of context. So who writes that? People with agendas. People with little else to do with their time. Probably the same people who think it's funny that scissors come in plastic packages you cannot open without a laser - or at least the scissors you were buying.

But if you ask us at the 100 Hour Board. We'll go with Irma Walton. Although, she may also be the originator of the Nigerian scams too. And now you'll wonder if she's checking for your credit cards the next time she pinches your cheeks.

100HB

Yes...We Have No Bananas

2008-07-13T21:08:00.003-04:00

Q: Dear 100hrb

You've shown time and time again that you truly know all the answers. so i will turn to you for another solution... where do seeds from lettuce, radishes, and carrots come from?

Regards,

a green thumb...

A: Dear Vermilion Opposable Digit,

Ah, we at the 100 Hour Board love when our readers begin thinking more about their food (we also love the unabashed ego-stroking). There is so much wonder to be found in what we eat. Amazing things really. For example, that broccoli, cabbage, brussel sprouts, broccoli rabe, cauliflower, etc. are all really just slightly differently developed plants. Man has been at it for quite a while.

So before we get too far, lettuce take a look at your question. A little anatomy is needed first. Plants have roots, stems, leaves and flowers - usually. A vegetable is really the part of a plant we eat that is not either fruit or seed (like wheat or rice). Fruits come from the plants ovary and surrounds the seeds. And then we use herbs (green parts) and spices (non-green parts). Vegetables are leaves, stems, pods, roots, storage vessels, bulbs, etc. Fruits are unique in that they are specifically grown to be yummy, in order to spread seeds. Veggies are things we have either become used to eating (bitterness), or we alter in some way to make them safe (soak, cook, beat, pound, etc.)

So in the case of all vegetables, there is another part of the plant that is an ovary and produces seeds. These then grow into other vegetables. We usually eat around these fruits, or eat the veggie before the flowers/seeds develop. There are few plants to we eat almost everything on it, usually we develop a breed for a specific part. Like beets and chard are the same plants, but we develop them differently to get good, big beets, or large leaves.

Take lettuce then. If left to grow it sprouts flowers - lots of them - this is called bolting. Of course we eat lettuce before it gets to this point, usually. Dandelion greens are delicious, and you are quite familiar with the flower.

Radishes are not roots - although some will dangle off. They are mostly a swollen stem, like a turnip, that isn't starchy like potatoes. But radishes are relatives of the cabbage family (even mustards too - which you may be more familiar with the seeds and flowers). They get flowers too - nice white ones with four leaves.

What does this mean for veggies then? You usually harvest - and kill - the ones you eat, and then dedicate another crop for developing seeds. There are a few perennials - like rhubarb, asparagus (grow from underground rhizomes) and Good King Henry. But many of these are not grown now because it is easier to harvest plants completely than parts of them.

Fruits are perennial, essential to the plants reproduction. So things we think of as having seeds (or eating them) are fruits: peas, beans, tomatoes, squash, artichoke - ok really a flower, etc. Fruits come from the plants ovary - usually in a flower - that has 4 steps: is fertilized (male pollen + female ovule - thank you bees!), fruit development, storage growth and ripening. There are exceptions. And thus are born "seedless" fruits.

Seedless plants are either 1) bred to be sterile - chromosomes prevent seed growth, like melons (though the sterile triploid plant must grow next to the unsterile diploid plant to get pollen) or 2)they are created without fertilization - like bananas, pineapples, grapes and naval oranges.

The issue with seedless fruits is they are a target for parasites or diseases b/c they are usually clones of each other.

Plant cultivation for food is a fascinating topic. We take for granted the years of cultivation, technology, breeding and science in what we eat. The 100 Hour Board for one is very interested in getting their own garden growing. But Community Supported Agriculture is also a good idea.

So - happy eating. Olive you to your food.

100 Hour Board

But Officer...

2008-06-28T11:13:00.004-04:00

Q: Dear 100 HRB,

All right, time to put you back to work hrb... when does an enforced speed limit go into effect, at the sign itself, or when you lay eyes on it?

Pat

A: Dear Speedy,

A local, municipal police officer pulls over a young businessman driving a new, shiny BMW. Behind mirrored shades, he approaches the window of the car. "Son, I've been waiting for you all day."

"Well officer. I tried to get here as quickly as possible."

In order to answer your question, the 100 Hour Board undertook several approaches. General research helped some. So did asking others. We even decided to speed and get caught so we could ask the officer. Several tickets, multiple points, one or two cans of mace, a couple of bail bonds and a new boyfriend named Chuck later, the 100 Hour Board can proudly share what it has learned.

Police officers find no humor in pork, pig or porcine jokes

Although it takes a while to dissipate, a constant stream of cool water helps eyes feel better from a direct hit of pepper or mace spray

Since speed limit signs are posted at highway entrances, it is hard to find opportunity to ask the question

Judges do not take kindly to answers in the general form of, "well that's stupid..."

But most importantly, speed limit signs mark the exact beginning of a speed limit zone. Not before or after. This is important to remember as you shift zones. For example, if you see a faster speed limit sign and speed up before you get to it, yep - you are speeding. I suppose some officers conveniently forget this fact as they catch you just before the speed limit drop.

So, the 100 HB does not know on what end of the speed limit and whether a ticket is involved in this question. But you can definitively know - and the bruise marks from the nightsticks remind me - that speed changes at the signage.

The real question though (or debate) is that many speed limits are well below the engineered safe speed limit as it offers a significant revenue stream for towns and states. And in the end also insurance companies that are state certified (you pay points). And in recent times, with budget shortfalls, towns and states are increasing their activity and decreasing tolerence for speeding. Is it fair? Probably not. Does it save you in taxes? Maybe a little. Just don't speed. Or at least go the correct speed under conditions - which in many states allows for faster driving given the 'safe flow of traffic'.

Oh - and those shiny CDs used to deter radars only serve as annoying mirror jewelry. No use.

100HB

PS - the 100HB apologizes for the slow speed in response, mostly attributed to the delinquent behavior by one member of the board. They will be appropriately ticketed and the apt punishment meted out. Probably forced to sit in a disabled vehicle on the Cross-Bronx Expressway during rush hour.

Your Turn with "E" - UPDATED!

2008-06-07T20:23:00.007-04:00

Things have been quiet at the 100 Hour Board. I suppose all of our fans must be moving or doing yardwork. So in light of this downturn in activity the 100 Hour Board offers you two puzzles, both headlining the letter "E". Please comment with your answers.

What starts with E, ends with E, usually contains only one letter, and is not E?

Yep - Nikki you are right. Envelope.

The correct answer is "seven". Although "5" could work.

100 HB

(Thanks to Mental Floss for inspiration)

Though Mountains Divide...

2008-05-21T13:15:00.004-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

How many times does "Its a Small World" play during one time on the ride in WDW??

Animatronic Anonymous (AA)

A: Dear Global Animatron,

At the 1964 New York World's Fair, Disney released his "Children of the World" pavilion ride in an effort to promote global unity and peace. After the fair the ride became "It's A Small World" due to the popularity of the song. To this day the ride consists of over 300 Audio-Animatronics figures and 100 international dolls. It is featured in Disneyland, Walt Disney World, Tokyo Disney and Euro Disney.

But what about that song? You know the one that plays continuously during the ride. The song was written by the Sherman brothers, Richard and Robert, specifically for the New York World's Fair ride. The original idea was to have a cacophony of audio-animatronic children singing their own national anthems. Disney told the Sherman brothers to write ONE song, a "roundelay" as he put it. He wanted people to remember it.

So the brothers created a song that you just can't get out of your head. As Robert puts it:

"Like many songs, It's A Small World has a verse and a chorus. One thing which makes this song particularly 'catchy' is that the verse and chorus work in counterpoint to each other. This means that you can play the same chords over and over again, but with different melodies. The repetitive, yet varied pattern tricks your mind into absorbing the work without it becoming tiresome to your ear."

To have an image of "counterpoint", imagine laying the chords of the chorus on top of the chords of the verse. Measure for measure, the chords would be the same. This makes the capacity to harmonize and countersync the chorus with the verse.

The counterpuntal juxtaposition makes the song more interesting to the ear. The Sherman Brothers wrote many songs this way including Doll On A Music Box/Truly Scrumptious from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

In 1985 Michael Eisner, Disney CEO, created a huge controversy by stating at the Hollywood Bowl that "It's A Small World" is the most played song of all time. Record companies baulked. Robert Sherman came to the rescue by explaining that the song plays non-stop, 16 hours a day on an endless loop in five locations worldwide. It is always playing in at least two locations on the globe. The song has been remixed several times and was part of the Dance Dance Revolution mix.

The song's duration is 2 minutes and 41 seconds. Disney lists the ride as lasting 15 minutes. Thus we can safely say that you will hear the song at least 6 times during a ride. This does not however include time waiting in line. Also this does not include the stops on the ride.

According to Wired News the "It’s A Small World" ride at Disneyland regularly bottoms out because today’s riders, um, displace more water than did patrons of the 1960s, when the ride debuted.

So I think it is safe to say that you will hear the song at least 12 times while waiting, riding and bottoming out on "It's A Small World" ride. Remember the song says, "It's a world of laughter...a world of tears" so whether you like the song or not the writers will illicit one of these two responses.

100HB

Juice is Worth the Squeeze

2008-05-09T09:03:00.004-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

I love orange juice. But I hate bad orange juice, you know, bitter or off-tasting. Given the many seasons, the different oranges, weather, etc that when you open any Tropicana Orange Juice bottle they all taste the same? Magic?

A: Dear Mr. Simpson?

Orange juice is a real delight, especially that fine product "bottled" by Tropicana. A direct product of squeezing - you guessed it - oranges, the product is full of vitamin C (ascorbic acid - good to prevent scurvy) and potassium. Orange juice comes fresh, frozen, concentrated and canned. Concentrated has been a staple of orange juice consumption for a long time, in fact the 100 Hour Board has manufactured it themselves in a lab setting under vacuum. It is even traded on the mercantile exchange as a commodity. (Trading at about $120.45 / side or contract. Contract = 15,000lbs juice).

But our friends at Tropicana have been doing things differently since 1947 - started by Italian Rossi in western Florida. Although it is now owned by PepsiCo. All the juice is fresh - never concentrate - and typically 100% orange juice. Although several additives are combined including calcium, vitamin D, and sometimes extra citric and malic acid to add acidity to counter calcium. Though all the product is pasteurized for safety. So Tropicana begins with a fresh quality product. Do note that over time vitamin C dissipates from the juice, and so is higher in the larger bottles.

Distribution is also unique. From the beginning delivering fresh orange juice was key, and Rossi invested in dedicated trains and ships, including the SS Tropicana which carried 1.5 million gallons of orange juice a week to NY. Even now Tropicana operates the Tropicana-CSX Juice Trains which deliver great, fresh and protected cargo around the country. You can see the Tropicana terminal in Port Newark off to the right side as you head on the I-78 Extension East.

But how about the standard taste all the time? According to Cathy at Tropicana's Cunsumer Response the company focuses on proven blending of orange juice. Although a 8 oz glass takes 3-4 oranges, it more likely contains portions of thousands. Mass blending of quality product ensures a uniform, predictable product that offsets the bitter ones.

Cathy went on to tell the 100 Hour Board about the orange choices:

"We always blend Valencia in with our juice because it is the best tasting variety for juice. We also use other varieties including: ~ Hamlin, Pineapple Sweet, Parson Brown (and, if from Brazil, Valencia and Pera) "

Then she added a caveat to the whole piece:

"Certainly, we don't want to give away all of our secrets (for competitive reasons), but we hope our response is helpful." Examples could fall into quality control methods, expert juicers, chemical analysis, production methods (like the squeezing process) and the like. Measure of quality include brix (sugar % by weight), acidity, citrus oil level, pulp level, pulp cell integrity, color, viscosity, microbiological contamination, mouth feel, and taste.

Hope this sheds some light on that delicious morning treat. I may try their new product Valencia Tropicana Pure. At this site you can experience the "see, hear and feel the flavor." Like listening to the music written specifically as inspired by the juice. Or creating the 'visual' experience yourself. I offer my own creation:

And lastly you can 'feel' the flavor by remixing the music yourself. Again, a shot of my creation:

It's worth a gander.

100HB

Posting Anon

2008-04-22T20:54:00.003-04:00

Q: Dear 100HB,

Why do we call an unidentified dead guy "John Doe" (or of course there's Jane Doe). I assume John/Jane are just common names, but where on earth did the "Doe" part come from???

Regards,

CSI Fan

A: Dear CSI Connoisseur,

If I were your husband I would begin to worry about being a CSI fan. Especially if you're taking notes while watching. I wouldn't want to be unidentifiable later.

But your question is an interesting one, considering the history of this term comes from one region where it isn't used any more, and is popular in another. In America John Doe is used for an unidentified person, generally a dead one because a live one could usually tell you who they are. Unless they are really old and forget, or a boxer. But John Doe can also be used in court cases where the defendant (usually) isn't know or named.

Of course we have expanded this usage to include a variety of sexes and relations: Jane Doe, and for siblings, James, Judy, etc., and children - Baby Doe. Although Precious Doe has been used for a child also (at least in one case in KC). So where do they come from?

The 100HB first turned to the local University morgue for an answer. We figured that those workers who dealt with and studied unidentified bodies may know the term's history. So please imagine the the 100HB journeying to the deep, dark dungeon of the hospital, echoing steps along the tiled, serpentine hallways. The lights flicker, a chilled wind passes and we enter through double steel doors in to the morgue. Walls of brushed, mirrored boxes each with its own occupant. Sheets lay over subtle forms, punctuated by the pungent smell of chemicals and death. Our mortician hovers over the latest customer, saw in one hand, and a roast beef sandwich in the other. Ok, not really. But you get the idea.

The morgue's take on our term's origins? John Doe was used in English law as a legal term for a familiar case study.

But is it true? Yes!

John Doe was invented in England, is now used in America (and Canada somewhat) and no longer in England. In the reign of King Edward III (mid 14th Century) John Doe and Richard Roe were two names used to describe a generic property case where the landlord Doe leases and then ejects Roe. The names do not mean anything (although Doe is a female deer and Roe is a small English deer), but they stuck. Both terms are now used in American law, and by extension to 'identify' unknown bodies. In fact the Roe in Roe v Wade is such a fictitious name.

So what do they use in England? John Smith or Joe Bloggs. However according to Dickson in What's in a Name, John Doe and Richard Roe are required in legal proceedings for the 1st and 2nd names (followed by John Stiles and Richard Miles.

And in other countries? A lot use some type of NN: nomen nescio, Latin for I don't know the name. But Fulan(o) is also common (Brazil, Middle East, etc.) and in France it is Jean Dupont.

But John Doe is also the name of the creepy serial killer in Seven, who kills according to the seven deadly sins (lust, gluttany, greed, sloth, wrath, envy and pride). He finishes the movie in one of the twisted endings in movie history. Much scarier than just an unknown body.

100HB

Musical Logos

2008-04-22T17:40:00.005-04:00

Dear 100 Hour Board:

Q: How does the NCAA deal with changing the logos on the basketball floors for various games?

A: Dear Ms. Double-Dribble:

In this world of brand management and recognition it is essential that the drunk masses of March Madness fans from across the nation recognize the team they have shown up to cheer. Or at least the game. Luckily for us and the NCAA Gary Gray, Connor Sport Court's Southwest Regional Manager has a solution. You asked the question and 100 Hour Board went right to the source.
Gray: "Remember those tile games you used to play as a kid? Where you had to shift the tiles around to recreate the image printed on them? Connor Sport Court's offers a solution kind of like that. It's exactly what we did for the NCAA championship."
100HrB: "Exactly, really? Does that mean between games we have NCAA employees working out which tile to move where just to get the next logo in just right? It's like a strategy game in between basketball games. Do the fans just love that?"
Gray: "Okay, not exactly. There floor has a zipper configuration. We start in the center of the arena and work in both directions we incorporated seven panels that can be changed."
100HrB: "Why? Why change them? Why all this musical logo business?"
Gray: "Why? Well...I've never thought of that before."
100HrB: "You sell a product that you haven't defined the need for?"
Gray: (nervous laughter) "No." (more nervous laughter) "I sell a product that enables fans and TV viewers to recognize what game they are watching. With more than 64 games played for the tournament, viewers will flip channels until they find the game they want. It's easier when they recognize the logo on the Quicklock court."
100HrB: "So Quicklock is for ADD channel switchers like my father?"
Gray: "Sounds like a promising niche market to me. Fight ADD with Quicklock."

While Gray works on passing those clinical trials we'll explain Connor Sport Court's Quicklock portable court. It comprises of a concrete substrate, with recycled rubber product- Nike Grind- providing resiliency and shock absorption on the bottom of each panel. This also makes the players jump higher- but just a smidgen. The Maple Flooring is varnished and created in panels that interlock.

But really, Gray is Mr. Corporate America pushing a product that might not be that great. It isn't like his employees have to change the logos. What about ease of use?

100HrB was able to speak with Director of the McKay Events Center at Utah Valley State College, Mark Hildebrand. Mark and his team have less than one hour between basketball games scheduled for UVSC Lady Wolverines and the new NBA Development League team, the Utah Flash.

Hildebrand: "It works great. We take out the Wolverine logos and replace them with Flash logos and have a few minutes to spare."
100HrB: "But how long does this take you?"
Hildebrand: "We put the whole court down in two hours and forty minutes."
100HrB: "And the logo panels?"
Hildebrand: "About 20 minutes."
100HrB: "So you would say that replacing Connor Sports Court's logo panels is easier than finding a second wife in San Angelo, TX?"
Hildebrand: (chuckling) "Well, I don't know about that...don't they shoot new comers who want to stake claim to their girls? We don't have anyone shooting at us."
100HrB: "Alright. So you are afraid to go on record. Let's move on. The question that is really burning is why change the logos? Are fans really that stupid not to know what game they showed up to watch?"
Hildebrand: "It's all part of the experience. The brand of the team. Making the fans feel as though they are a part of the actual team."
100HrB: "But if the teams suck- you know like the...what are they called? Wolverines and Flash? Yeah, well if they suck like these teams do fans really care about brand? Besides who wants to watch women calling themselves wolverines? I've seen X-Men and that guy was hairy.
Hildebrand: (laughing) "No comment."
100HrB: "So it has nothing to do with the gallons of alcohol fans swim in during the games that impairs judgement as to where they are located?"
Hildebrand: "I don't know anything about that. We have a four drink minimum in Utah."
100HrB: "You can't swim in 32 oz. of alcohol?"
Hildebrand: (chuckling again...I swear this man isn't serious) "I don't think so."
100HrB: "How does that make fans part of the team?"
Hildebrand: "We immerse them in visuals and concessions."

So there you have it. The NCAA uses the Quicklock portable panel system that saves trees and makes for quick, efficient turn-around times between games. Oh, it also is a potential helper for those suffering from ADD. What it doesn't do is assist with your foul shot. So keep dreaming Double-Dribble!

HRB

Board Question

2008-04-15T21:06:00.003-04:00

Q:
How do you ask a question on your 100 board?
Flying Cumulus

A: Dear Airborne Nimbus

You just did. Look forward to more.

HRB

Count It Yourself!

2008-04-15T21:00:00.003-04:00

Q: 100hrb
How many times do you say good question(?) to a good question?
The Patronizer

A: Dear 'Patron' of the Board,
2%
But if you count that one of these was actually "excellent question" it is only 1%.
But even if the Board does say 'good question' it may actually be just a lie and we look to make you feel better.
HRB

Greening the Diamond

2008-04-07T22:16:00.004-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board

How do major league grounds crews get the grass looking so green on opening day before the normal blossoms of spring ~ thank you george toma.

Pat

A: Dear Baseball Aficionado,

Care and love. It is possible. Although I assume you are asking about colder weather parks and not just Turner Field or Tropicana Field. (Although Tropicana Field in Tampa Bay uses artificial grass) Of course there are fundamentals. It is only recently that ballparks are switching back to real grass en masse. There was a long trend of artificial turf because it stayed green consistently. Water management remained the biggest issue. Nowadays all 16 National League teams and all but 3 American League teams use grass. (Tampa Bay, Minnesota and Toronto don't - hmmm...maybe no sun :) )

Newer fields are a work of magic - or smart engineering. I can only quote the system at Dodger stadium to give you an idea:

"The Dodgers installed a brand new state-of-the-art grass field after the conclusion of the 1995 season. Prescription Athletic Turf (PAT), created and installed by the Cincinnati-based Motz Group, used the latest agronomic and engineering technology to manage field moisture through controlled drainage and irrigation. The 100,000 square feet of bermuda grass is grown on pure sand, beneath which a vacuum chamber is laid over a water-tight plastic barrier that forcibly extracts water during heavy rains. New moisture gauges monitor the field's water level in coordination with a microprocessor that controls drainage functions. A computer controller has the ability to reverse the scenario and subirrigate when the sand's moisture reading drops below the optimal level."

So proper water management is key. Other pieces? From an interview with Boston's Fenway Park Ground Crew, steps include: watering the field, cleaning up, moving, removing and changing the tarp (a hard job - it can create a vacuum when sitting for a while), fertilize, mow, roll patterns, spread chopped up rubber tires into the grass (protects for wear and tear), and finally repaint lines. This all helps.

But I found an article from Baseball Field Renovation that offers tips on how to get grass green (and grown) by Feb/March start. Rye, fescue and bluegrass seeds need sunny weather over 50 degrees to germinate well. Sometimes that is just luck. But tips include light straw, minimum water layup, black tarps to keep seeds warm to germinate (but remove it before it kills new grass), automatic irrigation systems and fertilizer. Another tip - seed every two weeks through January. Of course if you plant before the winter it's just maintaining the field and covering it at night.

And how do they get the checkerboard? Easy. Mow and roll it flat. The bent grass gives the patterns. But make sure you alternate rolling to keep from damaging the grass too much. Now go watch some ball!

100 HB

PS and if you didn't know George Toma - the legendary 'God of Sod'. Mostly a grass consultant for the NFL, he's an old timer the pros turn to for 'live or die' grass. Multiple Superbowls, World Series and other events are under his belt. Yes - thank you!

Science Attack

2008-04-06T21:13:00.003-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:
(Continued from before)
3. Please explain in simple ways (so that we who are oh so stupid) why gravity is so weak and the 6 dimension.
4. Why are scientific books written in a demeaning and authoritative voice? They are really condescending as though they know all when in fact you get reading the book and there are so many questions unanswered. Do scientists think that if they right with absolute authority then they won't have to defend their theories?

Your Bro

A: Dear Bro,

Way to ask the scientific questions. I'll help you get down to the answers.
3. Gravity is somewhat mysterious, but can be explained and discussed in simpler ways. It doesn't need to be dark and scary. Gravity is actually very cool.
Gravitation is the realisation that all mass attracts each other. Gravity refers to the force some suppose causes gravitation. Why? What the 100 Hour Board can't answer is what exactly is the mechanism of gravity. Newton described gravitation as a force between two bodies - the force is gravity. This theory doesn't really work out perfectly, like for planets as an example. Einstein discussed the force as a bending of spacetime, and causing gravity as acceleration. This is a powerful theory but has some failures on the quantum level (i.e for really small particles). Quantum mechanics uses the theory that objects exchange gravitons (wave-particles, kind of like photons used in electricity) that cause a force of attraction (like two baseball players throwing balls back and forth). This is good too, but fails to completely describe things totally. So there is no perfect model for gravity.
What we do know is what we observe and how we approximate this in math. Several rules on the gravitational force: proportional to both masses (not weight - that's based on the pull of another mass), decreases proportionally to the inverse square of the distance (1/x^2) - ie. drops off quickly the farther you get away and is relatively weak compared to mass. The formula is Gravitational force = G x (m1 x m2) / d^2 (d is distance, m1 is mass 1 and m2 is mass 2). G is a constant that is calculated to fit (a smart guess) = 6.67 x 10E-8 dyne * cm2/gm2. Yes small! Electricity (and magnetism) have similar equations. But the constant for electricity is 1020 times larger than G. You can't compare them exactly, but to get anything strong with gravity you have to be close and one of the objects massive (ie. earth).
To let you know - electrons keep you from falling through the sidewalk when gravity is pulling you down! That's strong - b/c they are pretty tiny.
Why is this so? Can't really say - we don't totally understand. In quantum mechanics electrical forces are governed by spin 1 particles and gravity by spin 2 particles. Confused - so are physicists. If you can figure it out - unify forces - there is a Nobel prize for you. To make it worse, some people think that all forces are connected and actually stem from one electron that is wrapped around the universe millions of times. Freaky, huh?
Is the dimension a 2nd question? Because there are really 4 dimensions in classical relativity (3D in space and time). But millions of dimensions when you include other things (mass, brightness, electrical charge, etc. etc.) Just another way to describe things. nothing says that gravity is 'the 6th dimension.'

4. As for scientific books, I believe your question mostly stems from a matter of opinion - relative position. Let us understand about science. It is only theory. Science is based on observations, hypothesis and developing a model. It changes all the time. The best that can be said, is that current science is the best way we can describe life at this time. So no - any scientist that writes a book has no authority to be the end all authority.
But generally books are written for two audiences: the unscientific and colleagues. There are fantastic books written for 'unscientific' people, with calm, humble explanations for people who do not have all the background. Other books for colleagues generally are written with presupposed knowledge. If you read them and don't have this, it can come off condescending. But finally there is a phenomenon in scientific writing. A need to prove authority. Each writer is trying their best to show a 'bullet proof' theory, knowing their work will be heavily attacked by sceptics. Must they be condescending in their stance? No, but they usually are otherwise people will reject them. It's like trying to prove you are king of the jungle. So some good ones? The Universe on a T-Shirt (fantastic!), Brief History of Time and Universe in a Nutshell by Stephen Hawking, Brian Greene's works. There are some treasures there. So keep on reading.
100 Hour Board

Holy Questions Batman

2008-04-01T21:54:00.005-04:00

Q: 100 Hour Board,

Couple of questions:

1. Since when did Lief turn into a bearded Vin Diesel- even with a Triple X Shield?
2. Since we're on history- please explain how the Phoenician's were able to live in such peace considering the Romans, King David, Alexander the Great, Babylonians, Assyrians, Hittites,Nebuchadnezzar etc. were surrounding them?
2b. Why after years of peaceful living with mercenaries doing the fighting did the Phoenicians turn to Carthaginians who were war like and pretty much almost successfully conquered the largest power in the world, namely Rome? Seems like a huge paradigm shift- what happened?

(To be continued)

A: Dear Inquisitive,

Let's slow down on all the questions (since these were 3 of 5 you asked in one shot). I can answer this, so let's take this one step at a time.

1. There are no known pictures of Lief. Or depictions. So who is to say he isn't a buff looking viking? Vin Diesel though is bald. So I don't get the confusion. The Triple X has less to do with Vin being a bad-$%# spy and more to do with viking women. (Have you been to Denmark!) Though there is something wrong with the pictures. Horns. Horns weren't typical for vikings - they get in the way of war.

2. Sounds like you know a lot about Phoenician history. Enough to be dangerous.

Historians have traditionally ignored this people, for a variety of good reasons. The chief of which being the answer to your question. They are the proverbial wusses of history. Ie. they paid their way out of being bullied. But were at least smart enough to make money at the same time. (Otherwise your life as a bully boxing bag is short lived).

The Phoenician empire was a rather loose connection of city-states sharing only a new language and similar financial goals, started roughly around 1500 BC. This amorphous group already suggests a reason for living peacefully. Even if one city were conquered by one of the neighbors, it doesn't mean the end. Which is why they are considered to end in 539, no 332, no 286...ok the last city fell in 65BC to Rome.

But in reality they survived solely by buying off the aggressors. The Israelites (as noted in the Bible) with cedars and gold (and a palace), the Assyrians (a whole lot to them), the Babylonians (ie. Nebuchadnezzar, to limited effect), the Persians, Egyptians, and so on. A lot of milk money spent on keeping bullies away. They tried to bluff sometimes, but generally capitulated.

This could only last so long and eventually the Persians, Alexander the Great, Rome, Egypt and others conquered them.

The city of Carthage did step out of the norm and these Phoenicians tried to be aggressive. They attacked the Greeks in Sicily and Italy in retaliation of raids - and were basically pwned on the battlefield. But later, after the fall of most of Phoenicia, they went on to fight the Punic Wars (think Hannibal and the elephants sacking Rome). Why the difference? Well, several reasons: they watched their brother cities get destroyed, they were the largest city of the empire and a little arrogant, they had the most to loose in controlled colonies.

The real sad part? Carthage should have learned. In peace they prospered. When they grew fat and attacked others, they eventually lost. Until their very city was razed and the earth salted. Hmmm...maybe something to learn there. In a nutshell.

There is an interesting essay about 'what if' and Carthage's aggression here.

Regards,

The Answer King

I Totally Paused...

2008-04-01T21:20:00.004-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

You can be overwhelmed and underwhelmed, but can you ever just be..whelmed?

Help.

(6400)^1/2

A: Dear 5x2x2x2x2,

Yes. You can. Although not so much these days. But I'm glad you are cultured and stay up on Alicia Silverstone dialogue. So witty.

According to my research:

Overwhelmed: \ˌō-vər-ˈhwelm, -ˈwelm\
Function: transitive verb
Etymology: Middle English, from over + whelmen to turn over, cover up
Date: 14th century
1: upset, overthrow2 a: to cover over completely : submerge b: to overcome by superior force or numbers c: to overpower in thought or feeling

and

Underwhelmed: Pronunciation: \-ˈhwelm, -ˈwelm\
Function: transitive verb
Etymology: under + overwhelm
Date: 1949
: to fail to impress or stimulate

and again

Whelmed: Pronunciation: \ˈhwelm, ˈwelm\
Function: verb
Etymology: Middle English
Date: 14th century
transitive verb 1 : to turn (as a dish or vessel) upside down usually to cover something : cover or engulf completely with usually disastrous effect 2 : to overcome in thought or feeling : overwhelm intransitive verb : to pass or go over something so as to bury or submerge it

So let's focus on the timeline. Whelmed and overwhelmed came first. Then 600 years later comes underwhelmed. You can assume that the original words used were whelmed and overwhelmed. And gradually underwhelmed replaced the original word. So unless you are turning a dish upside down on something, you generally won't use the term any more. Or you can refer to Yggur's scary servants on Santhenar - at least according to Ian Irvine in The View from the Mirror. But don't worry they are afraid of light - so bring a flashlight along.

Regards,

I got a .45 and a shovel, I doubt anybody would miss you.

Vikings Ahead

2008-03-25T19:26:00.003-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

Please vindicate me. Where was Leif Ericson from? Denmark or Norway?

Winning the War on Ego

A: Dear Ego Popper

Well, the original European explorer, is not really Danish, Norwegian or anything. Not technically. But if you picked Norwegian, you are probably more correct than Danish.

Thought to be born sometime around 970 AD in Iceland, Leif was the son of Eric the Red, a Norwegian marauder (yes - isn't that every viking?). He was Norse. But even that name is somewhat misleading - as it refers to people of Norway, Denmark, Sweden and Iceland. It is really more of a loose collection of 'Northern' tribes and seafarers. Initially they started in the Scandinavia (Denmark, Sweden, Norway) but by the 11th Century were spread out from Greenland, through England, into Russia all the way down to the Black Sea as also in France (Normans). Odd thinking about Vikings settling in Sicily - but they did. Didn't need the fur then though.

So in this sense Leif is both Danish and Norwegian. But he is believed to stem from a Norwegian line - making him more from Norway. He did travel back to Norway where the king converted him. After converting those in Greenland Leif landed in Vinland, somewhere in Newfoundland - Northeast Canada. The story goes that they found wild grapes so named it Vine Land. Researchers have found Viking settlements on the island. Some even believe they made it all the way to Minnesota. But that's another tale.

I hope your follow-up to this isn't too ego-popping. But beware. If the other person has viking blood in them, you may be in for some pillaging.

Sincerely,

100 hour Board

War for the White House 2008

2008-03-18T13:31:00.002-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

Who is the 100 Hour Board voting for, for president?

Regards,

Inquiring Minds

A: Dear Inquisitive,

The 100 Hour Board maintains complete political neutrality in this confusing time. So the private matter of the 100 Hour Board's candidate of choice shall remain such. Private.

But it doesn't really matter, as this insider report from Onion Network News shows.

Regards,

One of the Shadowy Overlords

Tag - The 100 Hour Board is It

2008-02-08T14:22:00.000-05:00

1. What were you doing 10 years ago?
Finishing up my formal and informal education including: spending a year in a vow of silence among Tibetan Monks learning meditation and telekinetic tae kwon do, finishing my thesis on the General Universal Theory and rewriting the Encylcopedia Britannica in Zulu and Tierra Del Feugan.
Just ended a horrible long-term relationship with HAL. She was way too needy.
2. What is on your to do list?
Attend the award ceremony in my honor to obtain the Universal Sceptre of Objectivity
Answer more questions
Enlighten mankind
Discover the true meaning of Britney Spear’s existence
Finish my wives operators manual for men, titled, “Chaos Theory: A Study on Owning, Operating and Maintaining A Wife that Fits Your Needs.”
Return Stephen Hawking’s and the Pope’s phone calls
Get my printer hooked up correctly to the computer – even Omniscient superpower’s have weaknesses.
3. Where are 5 places you've lived?
Tibet
Eden
Emerald City
Atlantis – but only shortly before it sunk
Camden
Magrathea – where I helped consult on the building of custom-made planets
Kashyyk – home planet of the wookies, where I decided to grow a beard
5. What would you do if you became a billionaire?
I’d have to sell my properties as becoming a billionaire would require cutting back the budget some
Settle on a jet coop instead of maintaining my own fleet
6. Bad habits?
Overt, covert and perverted sarcasm
Always being right
Constantly correcting Mensa members
7. Things that you enjoy?
Being right
Acting in improve sketches
Mocking scientists during convention lectures and taunting them with the right answers
Playing with my children
Surfing the internet for fluff
A big fan of Coupling

No Reindeer Were Hurt

2008-02-07T14:03:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100hr board,
What the heck does "gamey" mean?? For example: My husband tries to tell me that something tastes "gamey" and I just don't get what it is that makes it so.
Regards,
"Meat is Murder, Tasty Tasty Murder"

A: Dear Wild Game Inquisitor,

I understand your frustratation, because although difficult to define by taste, there is something to 'gaminess,' that is the taste and texture of wild animal meats. I'll try to best explain.
Meat (I won't define this, assuming you get the idea) is made up of three sections: muscle fibers, connective tissue and fat. Each contributes to flavor and texture in their own way. Muscle fibers are either white or red (white muscles are for quick motions - like a chicken, red for strength - like an ox) which defines dark/white meat, and the differences in pork, poultry and beef. Connective tissues can be really tough (elastin) or when cooked - quite good - collagen - the stuff that makes gelatin and the good taste of roasts. Fat marbling offers 'juiciness' and 'tenderness' in meat.
Muscle has distinct flavors, especially red meat, and especially when cooked. Fat, though, is what gives types of meat its distinct taste. So what influences taste? Animal age, diet, muscle activity and type of muscle. The older an animal is, the more flavor it develops, and gets tougher as the muscles work and develop stronger connective tissues. That's why mutton is stronger than lamb, beef than veal. And diet is a big influence. Beef and chicken in the US are fed fairly standardized diets. And tend to yield mild meat.
So what is gaminess? The mixture of texture and flavor qualities unique to those meats: low fat, tougher cuts better for longer cooking and distinct flavors. The rich, variable flavor (not as 'standardized' as super market chicken) comes from older age, a wild, mixed diet and free roaming. But in the past, some cuisines have let game hang and begin to essentially rot to enhance the flavors. (Oddly, strong flavors - like cheese - often dance near the edge of rotten food flavors)
So if someone eats some meat and says it is gamey, it means essentially (if they know what they are talking about) it is overly strong, hints towards grasses and chemicals in wild food, and is leaner and tougher. You can't get wild game widely commercially in the US - not regulated by USDA - but you can get the idea at restaurants with 'wild' boar, phaesant and ostrich.
If you are vegetarian and not meat-minded, vegetables can be gamey too. Organic - or better put - in season fruits and veggies are the equivalent of 'gamey' vs domesticated meats. But it is harder to find wild packs of carrots or herds of eggplants sweeping across a plain.
Now if you don't mind, I'm going to go find some bone to chew on. I'm craving some meat!
100 Hour Board

A Little Bubbly

2008-02-01T10:58:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100hr board,

What is the difference between seltzer and club soda?

A: Dear "Me"

Excellent question - especially if you are looking to get some stains out of your clothes. Or your husbands as he has a tendency to drop things on them.

In short, seltzer water and club soda are essentially the same thing: purified water with carbonation added to it. But there are some subtle differences in modern usage, so I will explain. First, carbonation is the addition of carbon dioxide gases into water to make it bubbly. This also adds carbonic acid H2CO3 to the water, giving it that slight acrid, tangy taste we are familiar with. I'll offer you a quick timeline to help.

Original seltzer is bottled from an effervescent mineral water in Niederseltzers Germany
1767: Artificial carbonation is invented in england by Joseph Priestley
1807: Benjamin Silliman of Yale sells the first commercial seltzer water
1830: Lemon-lime, grape and orange, sweet soda water is sold and popular
1838: First soda counter in Phillie
1891: More soda fountains in NYC than bars
1886: Kola nut extract added to coca extract (yes cocaine) as a headache and hangover fix and sold by John S. Permberton in a pharmacy - Coca Cola begins
1893: My hero Hires invents root beer (also a pharmacist)
1920's: "Hom-Paks" (6-packs) and vending machines invented
2006: Coca-Cola made $24 Billion on 'soft drinks'

Now days seltzer water and club soda are basically interchangeable, but club soda ussually has addeds salts for taste (sodium bicarbonate - i.e baking soda, table salt, potassium chloride, etc.) That's why the 100 Hour Board prefers cranberry and seltzer over cranberry and club soda (but some bartenders don't know the difference). Club soda is a great stain remover - including wine. Just ask for some at the restaurant.

The real question is: if you get a club soda stain, what do you use to get it out?

100 HB

Respect My Authoritah

2008-01-21T11:20:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

2 Questions:

a. Who will win the 2008 presidential election? More importantly who will the VP be?(I'm thinking a Romney/Clinton ticket. ;/)

b. Why in heavens name does blogger need to have word verifications? What are their purpose? Why, oh, why must they be on the otherwise wonderful 100 hour board?

Finally, who decides what the verifications are? Computer generated or human- I've gotten some pretty funky ones.

I HATE WORD VERIFICATIONS-This has got to stop!!!!!

Regards,

"I Like Big [Turtle] Butts"

A: Dear Caboose Aficionado

My toddler pointed out to me that you did not ask 2 questions, but rather 6.

In light of this, the 100 Hour Board will take 600 Hours to answer your questions, exactly 25 days, luckily after Super Tuesday polling.

That being said, the 100HB is not a fortune teller, and cannot tell you what will be, however much that outcome is desired. As for political pundit, it seams the only requirement to be one is to not have a brain, so the 100HB cannot be that either. The Board does however offer you some insite:

a) The front runners right now are Obama for the Dems with 38 delegates (though Clinton is close with 36) and Romney for the Repubs with 72 (next is McCain with 38). The issues regarding state polling are key in each state, as they've helped generate surprises and uniqueness to the primaries. A cross-party ticket is unlikely, mainly because a candidate can't be of the party anymore to run on the other ticket. However the possible entrance of Bloomberg will be interesting. In the 100 Hour Board's opinion - the election will be between Clinton/Edwards and McCain/Romney. Although which is VP and P on the ticket is not clear.

b) From Blogger, "What [Word Verification] this does is to prevent automated systems from adding comments to your blog, since it takes a human being to read the word and pass this step. If you've ever received a comment that looked like an advertisement or a random link to an unrelated site, then you've encountered comment spam. A lot of this is done automatically by software which can't pass the word verification, so enabling this option is a good way to prevent many such unwanted comments." Those bloggers who are more senior and experienced (ie been blogging longer than October 2007, have had issues with spam comments. Word verification makes moderating easier. Please see previous posts regarding the 100 Hour Board and comment posting to help preserve the nature of the question/answer format.

Finally, word verifications come from the same place Family Guy jokes do (as referenced by South Park). Manatees in a giant tank select balls with letters on them in random order. Each sequence then becomes a word to verify against.

100HB

Better than Ty Pennington

2008-01-16T21:59:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 'Your the best big brother' 100 Hour Board

How do you frame and remodel a basement?

Critchlow

A: Dear 'You'll grow up like me someday' little brother Critchlow,

Having a tough time with the basement? Moved into the mini-mansion and can't stand it not being finished? I offer you perfect advice.

Take a photo of your current basement as is
Develop the photos at the local 1 hour photo - or print it out yourself
Buy an inexpensive photo frame
Place the photo behind the glass, line up the mat
Put the frame back together - viola - framed basement

If you want to remodel it, you have several options:

Buy it a sensible dress from J Crew and lay it on the floor
Apply for Next Top Model and let Tyra do her work
Ultimate help - Queer Eye for the Straight Basement
Apply for While you were out

Now if these are sufficiently helpful for you, the 100 Hour Board asks, why finish the basement? There are plenty of activities suitable for use in an unfinished basement:

Use it for roller hockey
Fill it with water and open windows and use it for ice hockey
If you're doing that, you can add curling and figure skating
Set up a giant train track
Roller derby
Use all 4 walls and floor for chalk drawings
Run a shoot house for the local SWAT team
Two Utah words: Meth Lab
Hydroponic tomatoes
Start a business to bury mob hits
Pour dirt on the floor and tell people you live in a home with dirt floors
Fill it with ball pit balls - and have fun
Glue foam on the walls and build a recording studio
Mount trampolines on every surface and go nuts
Use it to paint murals or graffiti
Paint the floor and walls like you are looking down from Sky City in Star wars
Build a miniature city and be your own king
Dig a swimming pool down there
Recreate Jabba's palace

If this still doesn't do it for you, try this.

Hope it helps.

HRB

But Why? But Why? But Why?

2008-01-13T21:11:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
What's another word for thesaurus?
If a turtle does not have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Just take your pick! Enjoy!
Good apple post-i like it!
80

A: Dear Overly-Inquisitive 80,

In no particular order:

eadumdictumbiblios
lexicon
synonymicon

There are lots of different types of glue. White glue and those in the bottle are drying adhesives - they bond as they dehydrate. So in the bottle they'll not bond while they still have water/alcohol, etc. But over time you can still end up finding a solid bottle of glue for this reason. Though note glue like this is fairly weak. There are natural, thermoplastic, heat activated, pressure sensitive, UV activated or reactive adhesives (like those that make your car quiet). And the glue mussels use to stick to rocks is pretty hard to beat. But in case you want to make your own:

Here's How:
Mix 1/4 cup hot tap water with 2 T powdered milk. Stir until dissolved.
Stir 1 T of vinegar into the mixture. The milk will begin to separate into solid curds and watery whey. Continue stirring until the milk is well-separated.
Pour the curds and whey into a coffee filter positioned over a cup. Slowly lift the filter, draining the whey. Keep the curd, which is in the filter.
Squeeze the filter to remove as much liquid as possible from the curd. Discard the whey (i.e., pour it down a drain) and return the curd to a cup.
Use a spoon to break the curd into small pieces.
Add 1 teaspoon hot water and 1/8 to 1/4 teaspoon baking soda to the chopped curd. Some foaming may occur (carbon dioxide gas from reaction of baking soda with vinegar).
Mix thoroughly until the glue becomes smooth and more liquid. If the mixture is too thick, add a bit more water. If the glue is too lumpy, add more baking soda.
The finished glue can vary in consistency from a thick liquid to a thick paste, depending on how much water has been added, how much curd was present, and how much baking soda was added.
Use your glue as you would any school paste. Have fun!
When not in use, cover your cup of glue with plastic wrap. Over time, its consistency will become smoother and more clear.
Unrefrigerated glue will 'spoil' after 24-48 hours. Discard the glue when it develops a spoiled milk smell.
Tips:
The separation of curds and whey works best when the milk is warm or hot (which is why powdered milk is used).
If the separation doesn't work well, heat the milk or add a bit more vinegar. If it still doesn't work, start again with warmer water.
Clean dried glue by loosening/dissolving it in warm water and wiping it away. Glue will wash out of clothes and off surfaces.
What You Need:
1/4 cup hot water
1 T vinegar
2 T powdered dry milk
1/2 tsp baking soda
water

A turtle without a shell is soup. But I prefer to think if they are missing a shell they are just au natural.

100 HB

Keeps the Doctor Away...

2008-01-03T21:30:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

Which part of the apple is healthier for you...the skin or the inside?

80

A: Dear Fruit Connoisseur:

Great question. Food and science - my favorite combination Let's start with the obviously gratuitous download of facts.

Apples, malus x domestica, was first domesticated in Kazakhstan, spread across the Middle East in Greece, on to Rome and the rest of Europe. There a quite a variety of crossbred apples, but mainly 4 types: cider, eating (desert), cooking and dual-purpose.

Apples are fruit, a developed part of the plant ovary that contains seeds and some form of transport material. Sometimes these are spikes or feathery things, but for apples the plant develops some storage tissue that is tasty solely for the purpose to be eaten by animals that the seeds will be transported away. It is not necessarily meant to be a meal - just tempting (like the serpent's apple). Not much in nutritional value: proteins, fats, but it has sugars and a whole host of vitamins. Add in some antioxidants, a few toxins at times and fiber (cellulose, hemi-cellulose and other plant matter) and you have yourself an apple.

Now to your question. Best answered with some math:

The difference in the two:

Medium apple skin
Energy g 18
Energy kj 75
Protein g 0.05
Total lipid (fat) g 0.10
Ash g 0.08
Carbohydrate g 4.59
Fiber g 2.3
Sugars g 2.65

Compare the two? Skin is definitely not more nutritious than the inside as a total - but considering it is a small portion of the apple, per ounce it is more nutritious. It does have over half the fiber of the apple, so if you're looking for ruffage and regularity eat the peel.

(All number courtesy from Nutrient Data Laboratory from the USDA.

100 Hour Board - I'm hungry now

Freshman Orientation 101

2008-01-02T12:53:00.001-05:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

I'm a new user, but like what I see. But I have to ask you:

Isn't it a little presumptive to label the post "funny," not that it wasn't, but still? [In reference to the 'farts are funny' comments]

oh, by the way please remove the blog owner approval of comments. it's annoying and stifles creativity

BL

A: Dear "I'm only a civil engineer, so please excuse me"

I'll talk slowly so you can follow. :)
The 100 Hour Board is both omniscient and metaphysically omnipotent. That is the 100 Hour Board knows perfectly what is funny or not, and can therefore apply the appropriate labels. The metaphysically omnipotent part comes from an ability to change reality if needs be. So, what the 100 HB says is funny - is. And if you didn't find it as such - then you've lost your funny bone, become boring, or are actually the butt of the joke. (you'll notice I've labeled the post as stupid and board - the stupid is obvious - and that is 'board' not 'bored'.)

As for moderated comments, they are there for 2 reasons:

To prevent ad spam from annoying blog spammers
So that questions are moderated and kept hidden until the response is given. Although random comments are authorized rather quickly as needed.

If you don't like it, then you can suffer in the darkness of ignorance without our help.

"The light in the darkness" 100 Hour Board

Somebody Was in Trouble

2008-01-01T20:05:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear "new" 2008 100 Hour Board:
My question is, what is the origin meaning of the statement "Your name is mud"?
Regards,
R

A: Dear R-
There is some confusion in this idiom, its origin misattributed to a historical news story that is at least fitting. Either way the phrase means that you are unpopular, or have a bad reputation.

First the misattributed origin.

Moments after Abraham Lincoln was assassinated at the theatre (in 1865), the shooter, John Wilkes Booth jumped from the President's box to the stage and broke his leg. While on the run, Booth and his accomplices stopped at Dr. Samuel Mudd's house in Maryland, a doctor who without knowing about the assassination, set Booth's leg. Mudd was convicted of being a conspirator, although he was later pardoned. But from that time on, Mudd's name has associated with a bad reputation - and we therefore tell people - your name is mud.

But - this idiom first appeared in Badcock's (aka 'J. Bee’) Slang (an idiom dictionary) in 1823. The entry reads:
"Mud - a stupid twaddling fellow. ‘And his name is mud!’ ejaculated upon the conclusion of a silly oration, or of a leader in the Courier."
Regards,
Spitting Image of Monkey's Uncle

Like a Missing Sock

2008-01-01T19:25:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear Long-Lost 100 Hour Board:

100 Hour Board,
Oh 100 Hour Board,
Wherefore art thou? Why must you be named 100 Hour Board. Refuse thy blogging name. Or if you cannot, swear you love me, and I'll no longer complain.

Regards,
Juliet Complainer

A: Dear Lost without a Guide,
First off, to correct you inquiry, the question "wherefore art thou Romeo" actually does not ask where is Romeo, but more like "why are you Romeo." Then Juliet talks about forsaking his name.
But to answer your question, the 100 Hour Board has been on hiatus, a vacation, for the end of last year. Things were busy of late, and the Board needed time to get things accomplished, such as:

Negotiate multi-national, trade-relation deals between the US and European countries while at the same time take a cultural tour of host nations
Conduct a corporate financial audit
Design, purchase and prepare gift packages for inter-familial relations
Conduct marine biology studies on native fish and reptile species, including environmental, behavioral monitoring
Prepare multi-course, gourmet meals featuring various international cuisines

And a whole host of other activities. Hopefully, you all haven't been too deprived. The new season is open for more questions. And remember, applications are still open for open 100 Hour Board positions.

100HB

Hmmm...

2007-12-02T22:29:00.001-05:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have a question in the queue - when will you answer it?

Regards,
Outraged

A: Dear Overly Excited Reader

The 100 Hour Board is leaving town for 1 week. After this time the 100 Hour Board will come back and answer your questions. Basically, the board has frozen the clock now and will restart it in about 1 week. Sorry - will be in a different time zone - heck a different continent. Yep, 100 hour board is off to Germany to learn more.
Til then.

Hundert Stunde Board

Just Hot Air

2007-12-01T21:53:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why are farts so funny?

Flat U. Lance

A: Dear Gassy,

The 100 Hour Board finds nothing funny about natural methane regulation. It is just part biological processes. Whether they are loud, whiny, sneaky, smelly, acidic, caustic, blubbering or just inconvenient. Although it appears that a good number of people enjoy a good chuckle with gas humor. Perhaps it is a throw back to our immature days. Or maybe there's a bit of laughing gassed mixed in. We offer the fact that people generally find surprises funny. All jokes are generally wrapped around a surprise. Add on to the fact that we are all a little embarrased. Another humor inspiring situation.
But the 100 Hour Board is not without humor - so enjoy:

Regards,
100 "Oh I can clear a room Vern" Board

By the Beads

2007-11-30T12:22:00.001-05:00

Q: Dear 100 HB:

How do you use an abacus?

Signed,

Calculator Challenged

A: Dear Antiquity Minded Mathematician

The 100 HB did not know how to use an abacus before this question, and it did take some time to understand the fundamentals of abaci usage. First off, abacus is a Middle English version of a Latin word abax (calculating table). But it is thought to come from Hebrew and Phoenician words for dust. However, the abacus has developed in parallel in multiple cultures, with some in the Middle East, Asia and Europe. The Russian version most know has parallel, horizontal strings with beads of different colors. The Chinese version - most often used now - has vertical strings with an upper section used for 5's.

Before I get into describing how to use the abacus, there are some fundamentals to know. An abacus is NOT a calculator - it does not give you a mathematical answer. The abacus is a tool to help break down calculations into manageable pieces that are easy to go through. The idea is to make math as simple as needed to require little thinking. It will then keep track of your work.

Usually each string is a different units holder: ones, tens, hundreds, etc. Although you can build an abacus with a different base unit all the time. Each bead represents one (or sometimes 5) or any other number you want. These are what you keep track with.

Now...on to math on the abacus. You can do addition, subtraction, division and multiplication fairly easy on the abacus. With some work you can also do square roots and the like. Basically for addition and subtraction: you set the number you will add to (or take from) on your abacus and begin adding the other number one unit place at a time. The abacus can help you carry digits easily (you can use a concept of the residual number - ie. you are adding 6 to 7, clear the 7 and subtract 4 - the residual or 10 minus 6 - after you add a tens digit).

Example: 135 + 321 = 456
Step 1: With rod H acting as the unit rod, set 135 on rods FGH. (Fig.12)
Step 2: Add 3 to hundreds rod F.Step 3: Add 2 to tens rod G.Step 4 and the answer: Add 1 to units rod H leaving the answer 456 on rods FGH. (Fig.13)

For higher functions (like multiplication and division) you actually set both numbers on the abacus spaced apart.

Now instead of laying out a whole discussion here I point you in two directions. The first is an excellent tutorial on each of the functions. The second is an online abacus you can play with.

The whole concept is actually kind of neat, and once you get into the hang of it, you can move along nicely. Just note - to use it you must now single digit addition, subtraction, division and times tables. Otherwise you won't find it helpful at all.

100 Hour Board

On the First Day of Christmas...Nothing

2007-11-21T14:36:00.000-05:00

Q: Hrb:

I am a newly devoted reader to your sage page so if this inquisition has been posed before I beg your forgiveness. Tis the season to be jolly so I thought I would ask a question about Christmas. Why is it I never get what I want?

Yours truly

From a blue blue christmas gift guy!!!

A: Dear Recipient of the Anthracite Stocking Stuffer:

It's tough when you don't get what it is you want. Buck up kid. It'll happen. So let's look at the issues involved with not getting what you wanted from Santa.

You're asking for too much. Really, do you expect to get an Aston Martin in a red bow. Please...I don't care how James Bond you are
You are asking for something embarrassing to buy. No one wants to be seen in a knitting store, let alone get you a gift certificate there. Or one from Hooters, or from a pet outfit store
It's just not called for. Asking for a homemade, pet-sized guillotine is just wrong. So, so wrong.
You've been bad. Cheated on your taxes, embezzled, cut someone off on the road, took a grocery cart from an old lady. You name it. Should have made the good list.
You're too vague. No one can interpret a request of 'get me something nice,' or 'you know me'. And world peace is nice, but doesn't fit in a box.
You moved and didn't send Santa your new address.
Santa just doesn't like you. Did you spit on him at the mall? Maybe you peed on his lap as a kid.
No body loves you. Not even the man with a belly that shakes like a bowl full of jelly
You actually are getting what you want but your kids are stealing all of them.
Your wife burned them all when you forgot her birthday

This covers a good deal of the possible reasons.

Now in case you are interested in what the 100 Hour Board wants for Christmas, here is a short list:

A female blog to marry - preferably slim, in pink, sexy and a good cook
The Portable Professor series lectures to learn more
The Celestron SkyScout - so cool (and the source of the geeky-cool question)
A trip by Abercrombie & Kent to Patagonia

100 Ho-Ho-Ho Board

Have Your Cake and Eat it Too

2007-11-19T20:28:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100 HRB,

Can one be geeky AND cool?

Regards,

Looking for Balance

A: Dear Inquisitor,

This is a difficult juxtaposition you inquire about. We know plenty of just geeky people, generally the pejorative term for intelligent people. They are intellectually enlightened scientists, mathematicians, and yes even geeky car mechanics (like those who can put an engine together in 2 hours with a blindfold on). I suppose any dedication to the indepth knowledge of some topic inspires geekiness, be it physics or comics.

What exactly defines coolness then? Call it what you like; flave, cool, hipness (is that still a term?). I think it revolves mostly around being interesting. Interesting enough that you want to hang out with them, learn from them and just be in their very company. That is cool. It inspires imitation - what defines trends. And you can't manufacture it, you either have it or you don't. It's in your blood, or not. (Side note: The 100 Hour Board sees such a shortage of flave in the world that it regularly goes and donates extra at the local hospital.)

Geeky chief example: Stephen Hawking (yes he's geeky, would you awknowledge him at a party if he called out to you?)

Cool chief example: MC Hammer. (you wanted those pants, but would you let him trim your bushes?), or Sean Connery for the older group.

But can you have both?

Maybe, just maybe. How about those rare gems that are interesting AND you learn something from. Like Alton Brown, the cool king of geeky chefs. That defines geeky and cool. (He even has his own emoticon #8-) ). or maybe the Professor Fink from the Simpsons.

Speaking of the Simpsons - they offer some advice on getting to be cool (even if you are geeky).

Homer: So, I realized that being with my family is more important than being cool.

Bart: Dad, what you just said was powerfully uncool.

Homer: You know what the song says: "It's hip to be square".

Lisa: That song is so lame.

Homer: So lame that it's... cool? Bart+Lisa: No.

Marge: Am I cool, kids?

Bart+Lisa: No.

Marge: Good. I'm glad. And that's what makes me cool, not caring, right?

Bart+Lisa: No.

Marge: Well, how the hell do you be cool? I feel like we've tried everything here.

Homer: Wait, Marge. Maybe if you're truly cool, you don't need to be told you're cool.

Bart: Well, sure you do.

Lisa: How else would you know?

If you want a definitive answer, look no further than Potop on his blog. There is the beautiful mixture of cool AND geeky (if only slightly so). The inspiring prose is both interesting AND informative. His coolness can be seen from space. If he mails a letter without postage, it still gets through. If interesting were a gland, his would be bigger than most men's lower intenstines.

So, yes! You can have your cake and eat it too. It's a great life goal.

Sincerely,

100 Hour "Oozing Coolness" Board

PS - the picture is the timeline of coolness (or at least one example of it.)

Application #1

2007-11-17T20:52:00.000-05:00

Well. The 100 Hour Board has caught up some on posted questions, and any inquiries are again open to the general public. The last round was quite good - or answerable (don't know which quality is better). But in the light of requests for help I post the first of many (hopefully) applications. I post it for your review.

Name: Michael Gary Scott

Sex: That’s what she said!

Blogger Name: MISSterious

Age: 43

IQ: 4,6053

Blog examples - prior work – portfolio: My blog
"I thought my money problems were over, but they aren't; Ed Mickman sent me a personal letter saying I won 10,000 dollars... but it turns out I didn't. Why do they send that stuff out? Jerks. I was going to sue them but Oscar suggested against it, saying I would lose the case and the little money I have now.
I hate Tuesdays... they are pointless. Tuesdays should be no work day, I never get anything done on Tuesdays because I am looking forward to Thursdays! What day of the week do you guys hate?"

Education / Experience: 14 years of school (2nd grade twice), some college, Arby’s, successful paper salesman and manager for Dunder Mifflin, winner of 8 Dundies

A brief but funny anecdote: When I was seven, my mother hired a pony and a cart to come to my house for all the kids. And … I got a really bad rash. From the pony. And all the kids got to ride the pony. And I had to go inside, and my mother was rubbing cream on me, for probably three hours, and I never came outside. And by the time I got out, the pony was already in the truck and around the corner. So that was my worst birthday.

Question Response: Well, 100 Hour Board, lack of knowledge on any single topic should be no reason to keep you from being involved. I wasn’t even able to finish college, but am on the fast track for upper management. Your best bet is to use your practiced ability to do improv. This will help you talk about any thing discussed in conversation. I have been able to talk about sexual harassment, business skills, racism, premature deaths, and many other topics off the cuff. If you are in need of any conversational topic, I suggest focusing on interesting things. Like wilderness survival (I have brought with me only the bare essentials. A knife. A roll of duct tape. In case I need to fashion a shelter, or make some sort of water vessel.), business (There are four kinds of business. Tourism, food service, railroads and sales. And hospitals slash manufacturing. And air travel.), or even rabies (Myth: Three Americans every year die from rabies. Fact: Four Americans every year die from rabies). This should keep you out of trouble. If it still doesn’t work my assistant uses random facts. Like point out that the black line in shrimp is feces. They’ll forget whatever they were talking about. And really think you are cool.

Clean-up on Aisle 8

2007-11-15T20:55:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100-hour board:
like it or love it, Walmart seems to be everywhere you turn here in America. Advocates say that it is a great American model of, "make it cheaper, get it sooner" big business that not only helps lower the cost of living for us all - but brings revenue to foreign countries and creates jobs. The Walmart haters crowd often counters with the charge that Walmart destroys American business, and exploits foreign (Chinese) workers. So here is the big question: is Walmart a net good or a net evil? Should I feel guilty when I shop there, or should I revel in the low prices? And who does Walmart really help?Pinching my pennies (hopefully not my morals),
Regards,
"The big 3B"

A: Dear Triple B:
This is a tough question, depending on the moral framework in which you evaluate something as good or evil. But I won’t delve into a discussion of philosophic moral concepts. So I begin with some facts regarding Walmart:
The largest company in the world (2007 #’s)
Revenue $351 Billion
Net Income $11.3 Billion
1.9 million employees (4th largest, number one being People’s Liberation Army of China)
Largest US grocer – 20% of the market
“Always Low Prices” company philosophy

Now a “good/bad” discussion. I will first lay out the facts and then the disputed or grey areas:
Good:
Huge employer with benefits
Lower prices for lower-income families
$51 Billion in current liabilities – money they directly give back for doing business
$264 Billion in cost of goods sold – basically business they create with their vendors
6779 stores world wide
Extend luxuries to lower income parts of the population
Vendor product introduction – they can introduce new products easily to vast #’s of people
336% growth in 10 years – huge return for investors and public
In the US they paid out $890 million in retirement plan expenses
$415 million in charitable gifts
Creates new businesses with new vendors

Bad:
Creates pollution, forces smaller competitors out of business
Foreign product sourcing - especially b/c perhaps we should be more distinguishing with our $ to China
Some lower wages and benefits compared to retailers

Grey area:
Low wages and benefits – ~$10.11/hr but generally less skilled people
Opposes labor unions – is that bad? Good?
Child labor, illegal labor – occurrences but not rampant
Complaints of general unsavory business practices (tax evasion, etc.)

OK…generally there are a lot of issues with a company larger than the gross national product of most countries. Some are valid, others not. Studies show that although a Walmart puts some local businesses out of business, many small businesses benefit. But studies are generally inconclusive (either way). Wages may be lower, and they have huge turnover, but they train very unskilled workers and tons of people want to work there.

So, the main questions regarding Walmart are: Do you believe in free, world markets? Do you believe that free markets level the world playing field? If you don’t than Walmart is evil. If you do, it is good. Not the best answer perhaps, but will you find yourself buying something there this Christmas?
100 Hour Board

Inside Out

2007-11-13T14:34:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:
Apparently, that is some sort of really cool inside joke, Scoreboards. [In reference to the post "Pedal Your Way to Taxes")
Which leads to the question, how do inside jokes differ from any other jokes? Just because two people know it rather than 3 or more?Please explain to me the difference.
Sincerely,
The Butt

A: Dear Butt of the Joke

Inside jokes are not numerically specified. In-jokes are only identified by requiring a priori information in order to understand the humor. The group sizes can be large (although at least must be one less than the number of people on earth to be designated an 'inside joke'. Unless of course all living people have an in-joke, excluding all the dead or unborn ones. But that seems unlikely). Groups include; friends, family, frats, clubs, professions, races, communities, businesses, aficionados, and so on.
That you aren't in the know on these jokes just demonstrates the horribly lonely life you must lead. Just remember, they are not laughing with you, they are laughing at you. I suppose you could even have an inside joke with yourself - or with someone like Gwitter.
And no, the scoreboard joke was not an in-joke, just required mental acuity.
I offer you several examples of inside jokes:

A physicist, a mathematician, and an engineer are sitting around and one of them says "It says here that Professor X has come up with a new theorem that all odd numbers greater than 2 are prime". Each person present thinks to himself:
Mathematician: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, the rest follows by Mathematical induction.
Physicist: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is an experimental error, 11 is prime...
Engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is approximately prime, 11 is prime, 13 is prime ...
Mechanical engineer: 3 is prime, 4 is prime, 5 is prime, 6 is prime...
Computer engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime...

or

A mathematician, a biologist and a physicist are sitting in a street café watching people entering and leaving the house on the other side of the street. First they see two people going into the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three persons coming out of the house. The physicist says, "The measurement wasn't accurate." The biologist says, "They must have reproduced." The mathematician says, "If one more person enters the house then it will be empty."

Now these are highly dependent on your scientific foreknowledge. I'll let you decipher them. But I think they're funny. (Especially the computer engineer... :) )

Or one of my favorite is Isaac Asimov's work on tiotimoline, that is so soluble in water, it actually dissolves 1.12 seconds before it comes in contact with it. (Because of the 2 carbon atoms that project into the future and into the past). But I save that for a different post.
Oh and if you don't like this post you can go hopscotch with a camel (you'd get that if you only knew).
Best Regards,
100 Hour Board

And All That Gunk

2007-11-09T12:01:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear 100hr board,

What the heck is the gunk that I have to constantly clean out of my roller-ball type computer mouse? It gums up on the wheels inside and is a pain to deal with, but what is it?

Signed,

Gunkophobic

A: Dear Frequent Cleaner of the Mouse Gunk

There is a definitive term for the 'gunk' you find in your mouse, what I can gather I've seen it referred to as cruft (as in the adventures of Lara Cruft) most mostly referred to as 'mouse-gunk'. This even by official technical guides provided by mouse and hardware manufacturers. Also there are some similar conditions. The 'gunk' that collects in watches has been referred to as 'puls,' but only in some random journals, whether or not this will make it in the wester dictionary (it's not) will be seen.

As to what it is...well that depends on you. Because, for the most part that gunk is you. Gunk is a mixture of dust and what you eat around the computer. (You are what you eat). So it's an amalogam of dust particles, bits of cheese puffs, remains of sandwhiches and what not. So what is dust? You. Dust is primarily made of sloughed off human skin cells. These accumulate and provide a feeding ground for dust mites. Dust mites eat this and then - well - poop. So there's some mite poop in there too. Sounds yummy huh? As you move your mouse around the desk, you collect dust and remnants that collect on the inside rollar bars of the mouse. You cause your own pain.

Now remedies?

First clean up. Dust can be removed by: wiping, swiping, or sweeping by hand, or with a dust cloth, sponge, duster, or broom, or by suction by a vacuum cleaner or air filter.

And don't eat around your computer.

You can clean the mouse easily - using cotton swabs, maybe some rubbing alcohol if you'd like (it sanitizes too!).

You are best off using a mouse pad and buying an optical mouse. They're much easier to use. And if you get a wireless one you don't need to worry about dust on wires (or crinkled wires).

Regards,

The Mitey Mitey Dusttones

Board Update

2007-11-08T17:45:00.000-05:00

Attention all avid 100 Hour Board Readers;

Seeing as I'm in the shadow of the Rockies in a beautiful resort, with limited connectivity, I have a back log of questions. The 100 Hour Board will answer these within the allocated promised board, but new submittals are temporarily closed until future notice (not long I'm sure).

Additionally, the 100 Hour Board is seeking applications for new members capable of handling the demanding responsibilities associated with sagedom.
Qualifications include:

Must be able to write - and write well - just stringing nouns, verbs and an occasional preposition doesn't count
Must be smart. Not Albert Einstein smart, more Isaac Newton. We're looking for the ability to handle multiple disciplines
Sarcastic, witty and funny - although not all at once
Blogger member
Reliable writer that meets deadlines - aka 100 Hours - and responds to assignments delegated by COT100HB (Chairman of the 100 Hour Board)
Applicant must bring with them a new collection of readers to increase circulation

If you think you fit the bill, then please provide the following application:

Name (doesn't have to be your actual name - just a name)
Sex (I'm looking for gender not quality and quantity)
Blogger Name
Age
IQ
Blog examples - prior work - portfolio
Education or Experience
A brief but funny anecdote
A 100 Hour Board-esque answer to the following question: Q: I am at a party, the type that involves cheese trays, witty banter and cardigans, and my career depends on my ability to gracefully attend to the social occasion (ie. boss's house, client party, networking, etc.) While talking to another partygoer a subject you are not familiar with comes up (say the microeconomic impacts of the industrialization of western Sri Lanka in the last 50 years, or the use of internet protocol gates on fiber optic lines and their impact on data usage, download times and connectivity). I am asked a question regarding my opinion in the matter. So...how do I respond? How do I save face? And what other interesting topic should I bring up to move the conversation along. (Ellen Degeneres suggests always starting with Gloria Estavan - the copper plumbing of the music industry). Points for creativity, wit and making me guffah/chuckle/snortle/laugh/giggle or generally be warmed by humor.

All applications are property of the 100 Hour Board. Applicants will be notified via post in a most embarassing and public way. We are NOT an equal opportunity employer - we don't hire idiots - even if they are savants. Please post your applications as a comment for review to this post.

Good Luck,

100 Hour Board

Pedal Your Way to Taxes

2007-11-05T21:21:00.000-05:00

Q: Dear Big-Brother 100 Hour Board
Why in the world is the US bicycling hall of fame located in Bridgewater, NJ? Better make a visit!
Yours,
Love to Bike 80 Miles a Day

A: Dear Biker Babe
The United States Bicycling Hall of Fame was until recently located in Bridgewater, NJ. It is not necessarily an official Hall of Fame, although it receives some acceptance by the cycling community and sponsorships. In fact there is a Cycling Hall of Fame in Westminster, Co - although they are of no relation. You'd think so, maybe one begat the other. But no, I am assured it is an indie location.
The USBHOF was established in 1986 to celebrate the history of racing and velodromes through the founding of a Not-for-profit Corporation funded by both Somerset County and the Borough of Somerville. It originally was founded in Somerville, but moved temporarily to Bridgewater. Currently they are in search of a new home, with most of the museum articles in county storage. Although they loaned all inductee plaques to Home Depot Center - the only active Velodrom in the US.
Their mission is to: "to promoting and preserving the history of bicycling by collecting, preserving and exhibiting memorabilia and artifacts relating to competitive and recreational bicycling, and to the people who dedicated themselves to the sport."
Let me break this down simpler for you:

Somerville collects $4.52 per $100 of assessed home value - i.e overtaxing burden
Somerville needs something to do with the money
Instead of cutting taxes...let's start a museum
Brainstorm ideas...hmm. Lance Armstrong is looking good
Let's create a not-for-profit corporation with a board of directors to celebrate biking
Let's put it all in storage
Borough: 1, Taxpayers: Nothing

An "overly cynical" 100 Hour Board

All that Colour

2007-11-02T23:08:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear I-Know-You'll-Always-Be-Smarter-Than-Me-100-Hour-Board,

I've read that trees use energy to change the pigment of their leaves in the fall. So, why bother? If this is truly a Darwinian world what possible evolution breakthrough could possible make trees benefit from this? And was there a time when the trees didn't change the pigment of their leaves?

Regards,

A 100-Hr-Board-Wannabe-Critchlow

PS. Why don't you ever comment on Critchlow's Counter?

A: Dear 'Kritchlow'

What the heck is a critchlow anyway? I mean I do think it is hugely more scary than any monster in myth - this 'small, aged, hairy man'. And he tells stories at a counter? Don't you sell anything? Counters are for counting things or selling goods. A hearth, table, den I can understand, but unless your selling me BS, I don't get the counter thing.

As to fall colors. Your first statement is true and false. Some leaves require energy to change color, others don't. Here's the 50,000ft overview first.

Chlorophyll is used to turn photons into energy used in the CAM cycle of plants to undertake carbon fixation - turning CO2 and water into sugar.

Chlorophyll is green and makes leaves green.

Chlorophyll is constantly destroyed by the sunlight and must be replaced.

The tree slowly shuts down chlorophyll production (clogs the arteries with cork) to slow down energy production as the winter months come. This is a function of weather, drought, age, time cycle from the first leaves, etc. Basically that the energy required to keep the leave healthy and move food around is not justified by the decreased food production in low light months.

Food is moved from the leaves into the tree slowly in the transition. This takes energy (remember this). You need to keep part of the factory functioning as you tear it down.

Remaining energy is in the leaves as they fall and used as fertilizer as it rots.

When chlorophyll dies carotenoids in the leave (that have always been there) emerge from the 'masking' green color - these are yellow, brown and orange (they color carrots, corn, etc.) THIS color change requires NO energy b/c it is a side affect of chlorophyll balance changing.

BUT...here's where your question comes in...some trees PRODUCE anthcyanins (reds, purples) as the summer winds down and fall comes. This does take energy. And in cooler night temps it happens more (more vibrant colors in bright days - cool nights).

So why? Doesn't make sense that trees would still use more energy to create a colour change as the leaves. There are two theories to date (many have come and gone over time).

Photoprotection: The new colors absorb light and dissipate it as heat. This protects the leaf from damaging rays as the leaf slowly dies. This goes well into the preserve energy production as the leaf shuts down.

Coevolution: Red leaves may serve as a signal to aphids that they shouldn't eat here. Or that 'specialized' ones should. This is a coevolved function. Although isn't as wide spread to be the whole truth. Some birds and animals are attracted to the leaves perhaps helping with seed distribution.

The truth is probably a combination of the two, that has evolved over time. Sort of like the evolutionary reason young, poorer portions of the population rely on bling (I swear this is a valid evolutionary study...we can talk about that sometime).

So for now - enjoy the leaves changing. I did last week on a drive to Pittsburgh. Oh wow - incredible.

Happy Fall,

100 Hour Board

PS - As to the question of posting on Critchlow's blog...I offer the following reasons:

Perfection needs no comment

If art demands critique than is it really art?

Lack of interesting topics - I mean fart jokes? Really?

Still confused on why I should talk to a little, hairy old man with the inability to eat ruffage

I don't need to add any pithy, sarcastic remarks to make you look bad

I'll wait until you stop making fun of the 100 Hour Board with a link titled "Stupid ?s Dumber Answers"

Holy World Wide Web Batman

2007-11-01T15:38:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:
wow... quick response this time! Here is another one:assuming that one has limitless financial assets and no need to attend to any responsibilities (family, jobs, meal preparation) is there any feasible or possible way for someone to finish the internet up to this point in time before dying?
Regards,
Triple B - aka "Too Much Time on My Hands"

A: Oh my, my, my Triple B,

This is a question you will not like the answer to. Let's start by laying some ground rules too.
First, the world wide web is an architectural program that has no single owner. It is considered a complex engineered system with its own idiosyncrasies and phenomena. Also, there are two portions of the WWW; the surface web and the deep web. The surface web includes only the websites and materials you can readily 'find' by searching. These are sites that are hyperlinked and accessible to webcrawlers used by search engine companies. The vast majority of the web is in the deep web - sites unlinked or protected to access from the casual user. This is a huge world you couldn't even access typically, but let's assume from your 'limitless finances' that you can.
Because no one owns the internet, no one knows precisely how many websites exist. Even in creating this post I create a site. And given programs like Amazon use there are infinite arrangements of websites based on viewing content (I don't think these technically count). The last time this was studied was 2005, when they believed there was 19.2 billion web documents on the surface www. In 2001 they estimated 550 billion documents total. This was included into 108,810,358 webpages
- but I don't think this nearly captures it all. With rough estimates and projections I can put this is the ballpark of about 29.7 billion single web pages now. Roughly. Let's call it 30,000,000,001 with this entry.
If you looked at the webpage an average of 2 seconds per page (a way too quick look given content and that load times will probably be at least double that - but let's assume money buys you instant access) you would need 60 Billion seconds - that's 1 Billion minutes or 16.7 million hours or 694444 days or 1902.6 years. Wow! A little beyond your lifetime or financial abilities.
Now if you want the whole web you are looking at about 1.85 trillion pages - taking about 117250 years. A lot of millenia. So forget about it.
Now it's estimated roughly that pornography is about .5% of the internet - so let's say 149 million sites. That would take 4.8 years to look at at 2 seconds a page. That is doable. A not so noteworthy goal to achieve. What's 4.8 years for an eternity of hell?
Then...if you ask about looking at content - do videos count? I mean must you watch the entire video posted to get credit. Than forget even going through You Tube.
So all in all...no dice, it wouldn't work to get through the internet. But maybe in hell you'll spend it rewriting HTML code for the whole www. (By the way the pic is .0004% of the web content)
I do offer some fun corners of the web:

Archival of first webpage

Weird Conversions - how many babies do you weigh?

Find your Celeb Look alike

Top 15 Manipulated photos

Just to name a few.

Regards,

Mired in the Web

When Hell Freezes Over

2007-10-31T09:43:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear Master 100 Hour Board:

If you were a masochist in life, wouldn't it be a reward to be sent to hell and punishment to be sent to heaven?

Signed,
Please hurt me

A: Dear Sadist of the Self

A sadist and a masochist meet at a bar. After several drinks the masochist suggests that the take off, go to his house and 'have fun'. The sadist replies, "no."

Three guys found themselves in Hell: we will call them Carl, Bob, and Brett, they were a little confused at their present situation, and they were startled to see a door in the wall open, and behind the door was perhaps the ugliest woman they had ever seen. She was 3'4", dirty, and you could smell her even over the Brimstone. The voice of the Devil was heard, "Brett, you have sinned! You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in bed with this woman!" And Brett was whisked through the door by a group of lesser demons to his torment.
This understandably shook up the other two, and so they both jumped when a second door opened, and they saw an even more disgusting example of womanhood gone wrong. She was over 7' tall, monstrous, covered in thick black hair,and flies circled her. The voice of the Devil was heard, "Carl, you have sinned! You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in bed with this woman!" And Carl, like Brett, was whisked off.
Bob, now alone, felt understandably anxious, and feared the worst when the third door opened. And as the door inched open, he strained to see the figure of ... Cindy Crawford. Delighted, Bob jumped up, taking in the sight of this beautiful woman, dressed in a skimpy bikini.
Then he heard the voice of the Devil saying:"Cindy, you have sinned."

I hope you see the wisdom in there somewhere.

Regards,
I'll visit you from heaven

PS
Picture it: rural area, Sunday morning, church is packed and the devil decides to pay a visit.The doors burst open, and a rolling black cloud rolls in with the devil in its midst. People jump out of the pews and run outdoors, screaming - all except for two. One is the Pastor, the other is an elderly farmer.
Satan is a bit perplexed. He points to the Pastor and says, "You! I can understand why you didn't run away, you are in your Lord's house, you preach against me everyday and you aren't afraid of me. But YOU (points to the farmer), why didn't you run out scared like everyone else?"The farmer crosses one leg over the other and drawls, "Why, I'm surprised you don't recognize me...I've been married to your sister for 36 years!"

2007-10-29T20:49:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,
They say there is more than one way to skin a cat, but how many ways are there to do said skinning? Furthermore, for what practical reasons would one be required to skin a cat?
Regards,
Hannibal Lector

A: Dear Favabean and Liver Connoisseur,

I'm worried about you and your predilections for cruelty to small animals. I'm afraid that one day I'll wake up in some scary house of torture puzzles to try and escape from, only to find out that it was all one of your twisted games...ok enough Saw reruns.
"To skin a cat" is not a new idiom in the English language. Some claim that it comes from a Southern phrase referring to catfish - or cat for short - and hence is used in preparing lunch. But that just seems to be a local use of the phrase, history points to earlier use. It was recorded in John Ray's 1678 book of English proverbs (proverb? really? there's a difference between 'early to rise early to bed...' and skinning a cat). It has shown up in several books, including Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court by Mark Twain, "she was wise, subtle, and knew more than one way to skin a cat”, that is, more than one way to get what she wanted. Apparently they needed fresh skinned cats back in 1889, or maybe that's medieval times, or who knows!

I've found multiple references to skinning a cat - including actual skinning a cat, step-by-step photo instructions. (As part of a standard dissection procedure, mind you!) But that's just gross - or too medical. I'd offer you one stanza from a poem of three ways on "How to skin a cat" by Sarah Willians but she's a little deranged. So...although I can't find a finite number, I bet there are infinite, hence the saying, I am assured there are at least 101 according to one list. My favorites:

Hold it by its tail. Shake vigorously
Wrap duct tape around it. Pull off quickly
Chemotherapy
Paint it white and take it to a sheep shearing contest

Although admittedly some of these suggestions are less about skinning and either just about shaving it or sadistic (use it as a lance or shield in a joust). And some of the actual entries are more about uses of a skinned cat, "shave a message in the fur and send it to an enemy." Apparently the use of a messaged cat is so frequent this must be a major reason to skin one.

As to actual uses, I'm sure there are a good deal them. In fact I'm certain that several countries serve cat much in the same way catfish is in the South. This is the primary reason - though rest assured that cat meat is hard to get in the US and illegal. But do watch out for Chinese restaurants that offer to 'walk the cat.' Or rather 'wok the cat.' But I offer some original uses.

To pass a regular cat off as Mr. Bigglesworth
To participate in the Body Worlds traveling exhibit
Nothing like a cat-skin stole to keep you warm

I don't want to get too creative in case you are inspired to make my kitties go missing.

Now, skinning the cat is also a jungle-gym move, involving hanging by your hands, raising your legs and feet up through your arms and flipping over. Although there is only one way to do this, so I don't think this is your intended idiomatic meaning.

Regards,

Protector of Felines

Let Us Think...

2007-10-26T23:01:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:
I usually stay away from things like this. I might read for entertainment purpose. But really, can one person know ALL! After days of struggling with this quandary, I am swinging the question your way. Let us test your knowledge, or at least if you Wonder 8 Ball is working. So here it goes: Oh Great 100 Hour Board, will the sister of one be able to attach the glitter to her appendage? Please try to come up with your answer within those 100 hours, time is an essence. Challenge yourself, try 99 hours.

A: Dear Interested in Short Cuts:

Ask Again Later.

Regards, Magic 8-Ball

Time After Time

2007-10-26T22:12:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 100-hour board,
Is the concept which we know as "time" a fundamentally man-made concept, divine creation, or natural law? Hope you aren't 'late' to provide an answer, seeing as how this mysterious concept called time governs the all-powerful board it's self!
BBB

A: Dear Clock Confused:

The 100 Hour Board finally feels challenged by such a wide and deep topic as brought up in your question, and hopes there is sufficient…um…well time to address this issue. I will try to keep the conversation above the deep philosophical, religious and scientific trenches one can stumble into when wading this ocean of inquiry. But I can only try.

Time is Relative (Philosophy)
Interestingly to note, time is viewed to be one of two general concepts, championed by Newton and Leibniz. I say interestingly because these two physicist/scientist/philosophers were constantly at odds in their work – for example arguing on fundamental approaches to calculus (both were right – we use derivatives AND integrals – one stemming from each). Newton, and all realists, believe time is a fundamental, integral part of the universe. And all events occur in a sequence separated by this dimension of time. Leibniz however held that time was purely a human creation, to help the comprehension of interrelated events.
Many a philosopher have argued this, some holding time is unreal, others that it is fundamental to existence. And it isn’t a new argument – with records back to 5BC and also some from St. Augustine.

Tesseracts (Science)
Philosophy and science meld into one gray area, especially in older science, but modern physics holds that time is a fundamental unit of the universe. It has a direction (although Steven Hawking suggests that perhaps we are traveling backward in time and don’t realize it) generally forward. (“Lisa – in this household we obey the Laws of Entropy” Homer Simpson) Time is relative in motion and in relation to events, but was fixed in relation to the speed of light (300K km/second) by Einstein. This constant helps fix time (with space) as real. (Though we can now technically stop and freeze light – but that’s a different entry). And Einstein was a proponent of spacetime – that space (distance) and time are tied in one ‘substance’ like mass. So it bends, forms and has character.
This is all well and good – but remember that science is always a model of ‘reality’, a representation that fits mathematically. What is real is left to metaphysics (see above).

And the Sun Stood Still (Religion)
Most all main religions describe time as real and a part of God. (Thomas Acquinas uses this when he proves God’s existence by discussing God’s existing before us – Ontological proofs) Some believe it is cyclical, others linear. Though for Judeo-Christians there is relative time – think of God’s day and man’s. In the LDS Church, time is a fundamental part of God and life. God’s time is ‘slower’ relatively, Abraham shows that ‘one day’ for the Lord is a 1000 years. Events occur in succession (creation, 2nd Coming, etc.) although the Atonement is infinite. All things have a law that determines ‘times and seasons.’ Some stumble on statements like “all time being before the Lord,” but this is more a statement of omniscience than the non-existence of time.

So what is the truth? Depends on what is real. The 100 Hour Board firmly believes it is real and fundamental. And we’ve already taken up too much of yours.

Regards,
Father Time

Fundemental Numbers

2007-10-25T17:58:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 100? Hour Board,
How many licks does it take to reach the center of a tootsie pop? It may be an aged old question, but I mean the owl in the dumb commercial toys with you by biting it by the third time. Does is vary on saliva excretion or what? Perhaps the Rolling Stones offered the true answer with "40 Licks," but honestly how many?
And on that note, how many hours does it take to get to the center of a 100-hour Board Question?
Regards,
80? 90? Whatever it Takes
A: Dear Lick Confused:
This is an age old question - or at least dates back to 1970 when the first Tootsie Roll Pop commercial aired discussing the question, "How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of Tootsie Roll pop?" Now I have never scientifically tried this out, owing to the fact that once I get to the thin barrier of remaining sucker around the tootsie roll I stop and discard the pop. I hate Tootsie Rolls, I'd rather drink Caro syrup (you know who you are!!) than eat it. So I never get to the center. It's like an asymptote in math - it never quite meets the answer and continues on to infinity.
Now there have been multiple responses and some scientific studies into this problem - the Sweets Company of America state they have received over 50,000 responses to the question ranging all over the place (from 100 to over 5000). They also site 3 studies:
Engineering students at Purdue built a tongue-licking machine that tested pops. Their number? 364. 20 Humans tried it also and averaged 252 licks.
A U Mich engineering student recorded his licking machine took 411
Swathmore students tried a human trial that averaged 144 licks
Interestingly, an elementary school study said it takes an average 9 minutes to get there.
It all comes down to some fundamental questions - like: what is defined by a lick? Are they the same every time? Do you rotate the pop? Do you count licking in the same place to the center? What other hobby could you pick up besides trying this out? Are you Gene Simmons and have an abnormally large tongue?
If you'd like to view the video please see below:(I couldn't get the video uploaded for some reason - please rely on the link) Commercial
Regards,
Sweet Tooth 100 Hour Board

Gunshot, rings out like a bell...

2007-10-17T08:34:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear Science-Minded 100 Hour Board:

Here is one that has been bugging me since I had a friend ask me this question and could not provide a good answer.Often in television crime and law shows they flout the crime scene investigators ability to match individual recovered bullets to the guns that they have been fired from due to distinct markings that are left behind on the fired round from the rifling in the firearm. Furthermore, they claim that each and every firing pin (the part which strikes the primer, setting off the cartage) leaves a distinct mark on each spent casing. With how much reliability can crime scene investigators match guns to bullets and casings? I'm skeptical of this science due to the precise manufacturing standards that modern firearms seem to be subject to, and the many variables (such as powder and lead fouling in the barrels) which undoubtedly alter the effects a gun has on rounds (altho very slightly) each time a round is fired. Is this hype that "CSI", "Law and Order", and every other crime show on television in love with grounded in sound practice, or is it another hollywood-hyped fairytale? Hope you are up for the challenge!By the way, roast beef sounds great right now! :)
Sincerely,
Grissolm

A: Dear Purveyor of CSI Myth,

This is a tricky one. Because the answer is yes AND no. Let me dive in a little to help you some.
First off, obviously most TV crime dramas are exaggerated. You have people like Horatio Cane solving crimes, making arrests and even leading a SWAT team into a den of Columbian drug lords (while wearing shades). If my public servants were able to wear Prada and drive Hummers I'd be a little PO'd. So it throws out the window police procedure, reality and even common sense. Then all the available technology (real or imagined) is there at the push of a button. So we obviously take this with a grain of salt.
But...there is some truth to ballistic forensics. Ballistic forensics is made up of four parts: internal, transition, external and impact ballistics. These are fairly obvious, and lead to examples like laser targeting, trajectory, distance to victim, etc. You are interested in internal, the path through the gun.
Ballistic fingerprinting (or better ballistic signature) is the science (yes a science) of matching a bullet and/or casing to the gun that fired it. First the bullet type is identified to rule out gun types (.22 cal from a .22cal gun, etc.) Bullets do leave striations (lines and markings) caused by travel down a barrel. Typically these are unique to gun type and manufacturer. Smith & Wesson has a right turn rifling in the barrel that leaves distinct marks, number of turns per inch, etc. These can help investigators narrow down gun type. Or even better, eliminate guns from consideration (not the weapon used). You are generally correct, manufacturing methods make reliable grooves from barrel to barrel. However, polishing can't always take out imperfections and wear can affect the look of the bullet. So 'fingerprints' can change over time. This CAN help identify guns.
But bullets are often deformed. Cartridge identification is even better - because they are intact - and can identify make, model, etc.
Generally ballistic fingerprinting gives a: yes, no or maybe answer. And variations in all of the above can lead to a distinct matching of firearm to bullet. But forget databases. The two that are functioning (Maryland and California) have yet to solve a crime (according to the Maryland State Police and CADOJ).
These signatures can be altered and 'cleaned up' but not every criminal is all that smart. (They still don't all wear gloves). So...yes it can be very effective. But it isn't the over-exaggerated 'reality' portrayed by Jerry Bruckheimer.

(Yes this is an overdo response. The 100 Hour Board apologizes for the delay in answering and will do better next time. Please don't put the bullet fingerprinting to the test b/c of this!)
Regards,
Mac Taylor

Not exactly white on white ties...

2007-10-11T19:30:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear Sultan of All Knowledge,

If one wanted to hire a hitman? I mean literally given our situation, how would you find one?

Regards,

Looking to do '80' years

A: Dear My Ever Growing Felon,

Oh my, oh my. Who in your life has gotten so under your skin you want to bump them off? Did you want it nice and clean - perhaps a bomb hooked to the car ignition, or slow and painful...perhaps a la SAW style? Your choice?
It is obviously not in the interest of the 100 Hour Board to offer any advice that may lead directly or indirectly to illegal activities. And even if we did, who knows if it will lead you to life sans your nemesis, or life behind bars. ;)
The news is full of stories of idiots who tried to go to the local divebar and hire them a hitman. Usually it works like this...ask a non-reputable friend, preferably one who has done time, if they know someone in the business. They go to the police. They even videotape your conversations as a future keepsake. And then a horrible news article is written about why you wanted to kill your husband because he wouldn't stop chewing gum.
Occasionally there are websites set up offering various hitman services, even some that profess to use humane 'treatments' that have never been tested on animals. Some are real - and lead to an embarrassing arrest - others obvious jokes. Craigslist may be a good start. "YSWM looking for contract work. I like long walks on the beach and using a .22 cal, silenced gun."
One guy looked in the paper, not for classifieds but for the latest person up on racketeering charges. Might as well go to the mob I suppose. (The same idea if you walked into any North Jersey diner. It may even be on the menu - have you seen those menus!)
My best bet is to try the local experts. Call the police. I bet they know the best contract killers in the area, even the going rates. And again, they'll videotape your meetings to guarantee good business. You may even get a pair of shiny bracelets for free.
Regards,
100 Hour Board
We are not liable for any advice or activities taken from or suggested in the above article.

I'm Thinking...

2007-10-08T16:31:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 'Food-Fanatic' 100 Hour Board,
Can you tell me where Arby's got their name from? We were driving in the car the other day and Mom mentioned something about R.B.s, like short for Roast Beef. Can you shed some light on this very important topic???
Sincerely,
Eating Beef 'n Cheddar In the Dark

A: Dear Roast Beef Aficionado,

I so desperately wanted to call Arby's up and find out the answer to your quandary. So I offer you a transcript.
Ring
Standard prompts
"In order to better serve you, your phonecall may be recorded." How does that person get a job at EVERY phone center in the US. It's like the 411 lady, "OK, I can help you with that."
Arby's Rep (AR): Thank you for calling Arby's, how may I help you?
100 HB: Yes. Thanks. I was calling regarding a question I have about Arby's.
AR: I can help you with that, sir. What is your question?
100 HB: Yes. My wife and I are having a debate regarding the name Arby's. I believe that Arby's stands for the founder of the restaurant chain. She thinks that it stands for Roast Beef. We have a Crispy Chicken Bacon & Swiss sandwich riding on this, so please help me out.
AR: Chuckle No problem sir, I can help you with that. Arby's is named for the company founders, Leroy and Forrest Raffel, the Raffel Brothers, also R.B.
100 HB: That is quite interesting - thanks so much. I rarely am right with my wife, this will help.
AR: Trying to hid the chuckle. Not a problem sir. Is there anything else I can help you with?
100 HB: Oh, yes, one more thing...what ever happened to the Oven Mitt. I miss him.
AR: Oven Mitt is helping out in our community service efforts. Working with Big Brothers Big Sisters of America.
100 HB: You mean there are lots of little oven mitts running around that need help?
AR: I can feel the smile on the phone. Is there anything else I can do for you sir?
100 HB: Nope that's good. You won me a Crispy Chicken Bacon & Swiss sandwich. I'll send you half if you'd like.
AR: No thank you sir, that will not be necessary.
100 HB: Well... thanks then. You've been most helpful.
AR: My pleasure. Please fill free to call again with any more questions. And you can look at our website, http://www.arbys.com/, at anytime for more information.
100 HB: Thank you.
AR: Have a nice day.
100 HB: You too.

I'm thinking Arby's now. Too bad that Rhode Island doesn't have any in the state. (Vermont either). : (

Regards,
Craving the RB

2007-09-28T09:20:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear Abby:

I'm having a difficult time coming up with something to wear for Halloween. My wife and I want to go as a pair - something that works together, but just are not sure what would work. It's only a costume to walk around the neighborhood with, nothing fancy - but we want to have something flashy. Any ideas oh wise one?

Signed,

More Tricked than Treated (A-Non)

A: Dear Spooked,

What a quandary. I can't say that I can exactly direct your tastes in Halloween atire - but perhaps I can offer some ideas. You take me as a fairly level headed bloke, and are not interested in something mundane like Salt and Pepper, Adam and Eve or the like. Though if you only wore fig leaves around the neighborhood that would definitely make a statement. "Shield the eyes of the kids honey - here come those neighbors!"

No, you need something a little more smarter than the average bear - or ghost for that matter. You suggest something flashy - but I'm afraid you refer to this:

May I offer you a few suggestions.

Ren and Stimpy - the perfect couple. And since you love little rat-sized dog-monsters, that would be a perfect selection. Although you fight it out deciding who is who.

Cheech and Chong - but again, is that sending the right message to your kids?

Gomez Alonzo and Morticia A. (nee Frump) Addams - I take you are both fairly pale. Just dye the hair you can go. Of course you may need to draw in the moustache

Eric Forman and Donna Pinciotti - You already got the redhead. And you are a skrawny, annoying teenage boy.

Trinity and Neo - but that takes a certain amount of coolness and flav to pull off, no not for you UofU boy

for a little more esoteric:

Liberty and Death - Watch out Patrick Henry! Do Lady Liberty and the Grim Reaper

Death and Taxes - The only thing that's sure in this life. (Grim Reaper and IRS agent)

Body and Soul - although I recommend your wife be the example of body - not you

Mary and Pierre Curie - you can use glow in the dark paints

AC / DC - the electrical currents - not the band. Of course that may mean you go as a plug and outlet - maybe too suggestive.

Finally I offer the best suggestions.

Austin Powers and Felicity Shagwell - Groovy baby! You didn't loose your mojo - you never had it. But that is definitely your bag, baby.

Captain Booty & Captain Blackheart - Yeah

The ideas are endless. Good luck - and stay out of trouble.

Sincerely,

Idea Central

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

2007-09-10T22:32:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Gurus:

Through my travels I have encountered several rainbows and frankly, I think I have honestly been at the end of one. In essence, can one really be at the end of a rainbow? does it just end mid air? In addition, can any geographical area have a rainbow?

Sincerely,
Still questioning colors!

A: Dear Color Confused,

Longfellow wrote:

"My heart leaps up when I behold
A rainbow in the sky:
So was it when my life began;
So is it now I am a man;
So be it when I shall grow old,
Or let me die!…"

I, as you, have a secret passion for rainbows, although given its recent transformation into a symbol for alternative lifestyles, I cannot be as free with my love as before - lest I end up in New Hope, New Jersey. (That's just not my bag - baby) But, even though I share this mutual love, I must tell you that once again (like with the penguin-red debacle), you are wrong. You were not at the end of the rainbow.

Legend might put a lot at the end of the rainbow: gold, the letter 'w', heaven for the Greeks, Asgard for the Norse, for Aboriginals in Australia the end is the giant mouth of a ferocious snake, and so on. But there really isn't any way to find out. Although you may feel you've been to the end, it just isn't obtainable.

You see rainbows are optical illusions. When the sun is low enough in the sky, it passes through small raindrops in the air. The white light is refracted through the drop, with red light less so than blue. As it bounces back out of the drop it is separated as a rainbow. You view the rainbow always directly opposite the sun in relation to yourself. All raindrops reflect the sunlight in the same way, but you can only see those that reflect in your direction. The rainbow is also centered around the head of your shadow - the antisolar point. You can get rainbows in other odd situations - like with cirrus clouds, and with sprinklers - but the same general principles apply. And that's the truth!

Of course, I offer two other pieces of info. You can have moonbows - or lunar rainbows.
Additionally, in Canada they have a different philosophy.
Regards,

Roy G. Biv

Round and Round We Go

2007-09-05T21:41:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

If you are driving in a car at a constant speed. On your left side is a 'drop off' (The ground is 18-20 inches below the level you are traveling on), and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping horse which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it. Behind you is a galloping zebra. Both the horse and zebra are also traveling at the same speed as you. What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?

Sincerely,
Anonymous (Cause who would own up to a question like that?)

A: Dear 'Been-Watching-Too-Much-TV'

You offer quite an interesting dilemma. I think I may be able shed some light and wisdom on this sticky situation. There really are some major issues here, so we need to dissect this a little. Now I can make some assumptions about this from what you've asked. Since the horse is the same size as you, either the horse is eight feet across or you are in a clown car (I don't think a golf cart counts as a 'car'). If this is the case I'd just throw a couple other clowns out of the car who will trip up the zebra, flip the fire truck or at least build up a satisfying barrier to my left that I can crash into. Is the world any worse off with a few less clowns?
Or perhaps - in case that seems too improbable - we look at it a little differently. If the road drops off to the left, then you are either on a highway or, better yet, in Australia, England, New Zealand or some other Empire country. If this is the fact, then the firetruck, which may be traveling your speed, is going in the opposite direction (i.e driving on the left hand side of the road). In that case, wait a second and pull into the opposing lane to either pass the horse, or let the zebra go by.
This may be the case. But if you ask me, I'll just wait til the ride ends, and get off the carousel. (And yes...that I came up myself).
Solomon the Just a Little Wise

Sand In the Most Uncomfortable...

2007-09-04T22:49:00.000-04:00

Q: Oh wise and all-knowing 100-Hour Board,

OK here is one for you to research for me... So we were driving down the shore today and I want to know why as soon as you hit the shore areas.... there is sand everywhere.. even when it is far from the beach/ocean. How does it get there? Is sand actually a type of soil? If it can travel as far as the "outer shore areas" why is it not everywhere? Did this make sense?

Regards,
"I think I'm spending too much time in the sun" Nikki

A: Dear "Down at the Shore"
I've noticed the proliferation of sand in odd places for quite a long time. For example, why do you find sand in bed when it's been months since you've last been? Or even years? And it scratches your legs while you sleep! Well, I did do some research and am ready to dive into this sandstorm for you.

First, the source of sand. Sand is really just granules of rock in small sizes (specifically 1/16mm to 2mm). A little smaller it is called silt, a little larger, gravel. It can be made of a wide variety of rocks, gypsum, quartz, limestone, etc. That's why you get black, white, red and other colored beaches. (My favorite is the black sand beach in Hawaii - although it isn't super safe to swim there - plus very sharp volcanic rocks). In the case of the Shore (i.e the NJ beach, home of salt water taffy, inspiration for Jaws - true story, and very hairy, fat men holding pepper and sausage sandwhiches) the sand is leftovers from glaciers.

A little background. During the Cretaceus period (145 to 65 Million Years Ago) glaciers cut across New Jersey, giving us a wide variety of beautiful features (think of the highlands, gorges, lakes, etc.). At the end of the glaciers (physically) near the shore area of the state, and at the end of the glaciers (they melted) there was a large deposition of sand. Leftovers from sedimentary rock. They call this till - glacial sediment - a wide mix of deposits to include clay, gravel, sand, etc. (Interestingly enough a really sticky form of clay is called gumbo - it's always about food!)

Geologically, in New Jersey, from Freehold south, across to Salem and to the coast is the Outer Coastal Plain. It is the youngest part of NJ - only about 65 to 1.8 million years old (part of the current geological age). And it is sediment - gravel and sand - that goes all the way to the Continental Shelf, some 200 miles off shore. It gets a little more complicated than that, but basically it is part of the landscape - soil. And for that question - soil is a complicated, little understood mixture of liquids, solids and gases. Sand can be a part of soil - along with organics, rocks, etc. In the case of New Jersey Coastal Plain the soil is typically Entisol (basically simple sand, clay, etc.) and Ultisol generally reddish soil that is pretty good but can be exhausted (and has sand in it).

Now this is all well and good - but I will tell you the real truth - not all this geological mumbo-jumbo. Sand comes from the beach - as we all know. And it gets carried back in land by many things - hence you find it everywhere. Wind blows it, animals drag it. But more often than not it is carried in the shoes of little girls, in every crease of the carseats and in human belly buttons.
Oh, and NJ sand is a money maker. It is used in casting metal (think car engines) and is the main ingredient in glass).
Regards,
"I Bet all that info hurts a little more than that sun-burn" 100 Hour Board

Unoriginal

2007-08-17T07:52:00.000-04:00

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Sincerely,
No Imagination

A: Dear Simple Minded

It's unfortunate that you waste the incredible powers of the 100 Hour Board on such simple questions that can be answered with little research or real travail. But...I will stoop to that level because no body is asking real questions.

A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
or
Ms. Woodchuck recently saw religion and has decided that given the impending doom of global warming, that felling trees just for the sake of 'woodchucking' is a horrible idea. It will undoubtedly lead to an influx in CO2 in the air, warmer temperatures and perhaps the cataclysmic winter predicted by Hollywood (no coincidence it is 'wood'). So our friend has decided to actively take up environmental activism, even to a terroristic level, and is no longer chucking wood. It began lightly with relying on recycled chucked wood - or upchucked wood - but has since led to wood alternatives like soak (like a soy version of oak). It's no where near as flavorful but can be slightly nutritious. Following these moves, she has decided to join a woodchucking commune or kibbutz to further the cause of earth good will and woodchuck free-love. It was recently discovered by the USDA Forest Service that she is involved in enviro-terrorist activities. It includes dousing loggers with wood stains - they prefer blue - like my wife, as also the destruction of any post-commercial wood product. So if you see a woodchuck in your neighborhood, beware...she just make attack you for building a house of wood, using paper and frankly giving off CO2.

Now...for the other question...
The chicken first contemplated crossing the road in 1847 in The Knickerbocker monthly magazine. So apparently before this time roads didn't exist, chickens didn't exist or chickens didn't even consider crossing the road. However, from this time there has been an influx of philosophical discussions on whether poultry should consider it necessary to cross the road.
Now the answers, like all philosophical fried froth, are varied, and I offer my favorite. Just realize, before you, dear readers, get angered over no real answer, metaphysical conversations have no known answer, and I'm afraid that Cluckrates, Ploultro, Henselm and Thomas Achickenus will debate this forever via Harvard's Philosophical Journal. So no...no definitive - this is the reason - but some light shed on the questions.
S0 my favorite:
Central Intelligence Agency: "We can neither confirm nor deny any involvement in the chicken-road-crossing incident."
Others:
Karl Marx: "The chicken was driven by the lash of economic necessity."
Amelia Earhart: "She could have flown."
Martin Luther King Jr.: "I have a dream that one day chickens will be able to cross roads without having their motives called into question."
DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road?Did he cross it with a toad?Yes, The chicken crossed the road,But why it crossed, I've not been told!
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain. Alone
CAPTAIN KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?
THE BIBLE: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?

Regards,
Thoroughly To Snide This Morning

Its all Bull

2007-08-12T15:16:00.000-04:00

Q:
Dear All Knowing 100 Hour Board,

I recently read a news article on penguins fear of the color red, can you explain this phenomenon?

Regards,
80

A:

Dear My Monochromatic Friend,

I do not know where you get your facts, but you are clearly misled in this assumption. Bulls charge after the red cape - although interestingly enough it isn't because of the color (bulls are colorblind) but because of the motion. The idea that penguins are afraid of red is just, well bull.

Penguins eyes are attuned to life at sea, particularly underwater. It is disputed whether they are nearsighted on land or not (I've seen facts to both ends - although you can look at Sivak, J.; Howland, H. & McGill-Harelstad, P. (1987) "Vision of the Humboldt Penguin (Spheniscus humboldti) in Air and Water " Proceedings of the Royal Society of London. Series B, Biological Sciences. 229(1257): 467-472). But it is universally acknowledged that the eyes are set to help them see prey and hunters underwater. This means the ability to define blues and greens well. Red is not a distinguished color for penguins. I.e - they do not see red or at least clearly. There is no evolutionary or biological reason to either. In fact evolution points to why they don't (or at least exploits that fact). That is most krill (a favorite penguin dish) is typically red, a color lost in the ocean blues and protects them from the penguins.
A recent Harvard experiment regarding egg-stealing in penguins, involved placing red painted 'eggs' in nests. They could track the eggs around the nests easily - as the penguins couldn't tell the difference.

So - no fear of ruby red slippers or anything. Just afraid of sharks and normal things. I guess they couldn't tell if another penguin got sunburned either - too bad for those Madagascar penguins.

Regards,
March of the Exploding Penguins

Circle of Life

2007-08-08T08:48:00.001-04:00

Q Dear 100 Hour Board,

Now to get to my real question: How many donuts does Homer Simpson eat in one year?

A Dear Pastry Inquisitor,

With 10 Billion doughnuts consumed in the US, the average person eats roughly 33 doughnuts per year. I do not take Homer Simpson as a thoroughly 'average' person - more like above average (except maybe intellect). With a height of 6 feet and weighing anywhere from 239 to 300 pounds (all official numbers) his BMI is something between 32 and 40 - all considered obese. So I would put him in a consumption range of something like twice the normal person. Now not everybody eats doughnuts - let's say only 50% of American's do. That's 66 doughnuts per year - a little more than one a week. That just isn't Homerish. Let's consider the 80/20 rule, that 20% of the population eat 80% of the doughnuts - that puts us at an average of 167 doughnuts per person or 3.2 a week.

"American donuts. Glazed, powdered and raspberry-filled. Now how's that for freedom of choice?"

You would think that Homer eats this much each sitting - but he isn't going out and buying this all the time, so I think he relies on doughnuts offered at work, for the most part. That's usually 1 time per week for a good - labor job (like the nuclear plant) + birthdays (or 20 times for a standard department - although he might roam and forage). With church functions thrown in, I put that at 100 activities where doughnuts are served. Eating 3.2 each time, Homer eats about 320 doughnuts a year - sort of fitting in with our BMI calculations. It's a little under 1 a day - which works when we consider that in the mean time he's been to the moon, raced cars, scuba dived, etc. etc.

Now just for your consideration, Canada consumes the most doughnuts per capita in the world. So not only is Homer not a fan of Canada - he'll want to do things just a little better.

"Canada? Why would I want to leave America just to visit America, Jr.?"

Regards,
Looking for Donutions 100 Hour Board

1st Question - How do I?

2007-08-07T16:10:00.000-04:00

Q Dear 100 Hour Board,
So how do I post my question?
Signed,
My Rebel Took Over

A Dear 'My Rebel Took Over'

First off, is your rebel a reference to an inner child that has taken over your life and begun to send you through a midlife crisis? (Not that you are at the midlife point yet). Or perhaps one of your children - i.e the rebel - has thrown your life into disarray, mounted an insurrection and is now calling the shots (not too far from the truth I imagine). Or perhaps you are referring to the Canon Rebel that took over our laptop and any diaper bag we take along with us. I suppose the later. Good for you.

As for posting your question, you've found the way. (This was an excellent question). You can post a question as a comment. The comment will be moderated and then added as an appropriate question on our board. This one was easy so I use an official time of 2.5 hours. Good way to start the board.

Regards,
Way to Fresh With My Wife for My Own Good.

Inaugural Post

2007-08-07T14:23:00.000-04:00

Q Dear 100 Hour Board:

How does this 100 Hour Board work and what is its purpose? I thought I could rely on my own intuition?

Sincerely,
Confused but Excited

A Dear Confused but Excited,

What an excellent question. It's so perfect for this inaugural post, I'd almost suggest that this was planted. Of course, the 100 Hour Board is not that duplicitous and takes pride in our work ethic and honesty. So I'll continue with an answer to your question.

The 100 Hour Board was created as an extension of my other blog Potop 42, focused on providing a little stream of all that fascinating information out there in the world - useful or not. Figuring that I can put my Rolodex of completely useless trivial facts to use, I created this board. It is a chance for you - dear Reader - to ask any question you'd like - anything under the sun. The 100 Hour Board will then provide an answer within 100 Hours. The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth - according to us of course.

I adopt the general motto: this is a place for fun. We'll strive to have fun and keep things light. Remember, if you ask something glib and stupid - you'll get a glib and stupid answer.

General Guidelines:

Since the Board does not encourage excuses to be lackadaisical, we are no longer accepting questions whose answers can be found by using a phonebook, calling a customer service provider, and so forth.
Not all questions and comments to the Board will be posted (depending on content)
Board editors reserve the right to edit comments for brevity or other circumstances
The Board may or may not respond to questions asking for professional advice. We are not professionals and cannot answer any questions that would hold us liable.

Have fun, submit and enjoy the reading.

100 HB