23.12.08

Can We All Just Get Along?

Q: Perhaps the next question should be "Can we ALL get along?"

Regards,
Snarky 80

A: Dear "Accident"

In this wonderful time of year, the Holiday cheer, the message of Christmas and the desire to be warm to each other despite the chill outside, fills our hearts with depression. We want to share our love for one another, come together and be a little kinder. Some of us, hot chocolate kissing our lips, glitter spread across our kiesters, and fit into sweats to accommodate our expanding Holiday waist lines, take up the call to arms of Rodney King and ask if "can we all get along?"

And then that SUV cuts you off for the last parking space at the mall.

No.
We cannot all get along.

And there are three profound scientific reasons we cannot.
  1. Phermones: Yes, those pesky little chemical triggers we release that inspire a natural response in other people. And I'm not talking about post-eggnog exhaust. There are the territorial markers that tell us to keep away or else. Which is why the 100 Hr Board has taken up marking the outside of our cars when we park in parking lots. All it takes is a couple of sodas. Just mind the frost. There are also epideictic pheramones that let other women know, "uh-uh you best not be touching my man and home. This is my crib girlfriend." (I think the chemical even does a little head shake too, while the extended molecular arm waves its chemical finger - so to speak). Of course there are sexual pheramones that start fights, scuffles, couch-sleeping and even inter-galactic war. It isn't the man's fault his head turns to look at a cute younger woman honey - chemistry made me do it. Releaser pheramones may even attract mates up to 2 miles away. Which explains the need for me to visit Quick Chek and eat a sausage-egg-cheese-hotsauce-breakfast sandwhich I am so attracted to. So, all those not-getting-along sessions can be attributed to pesky chemical markers. So next time you get someone angry or can't pick up a date - check your pheramones.

  2. Pedigree Colapse: Why is it you don't have billions of ancestors, when the math suggests you should? Given the increase in ancestors when you start counting grandparents, and the lot of greats before them, you would think you had lots of fore-fathers. Something like 3 million around the black plague time. The thing is, as you move back you start getting common ancestors. For example, statistically 70% of those 3 million ancestors are really some of the same people. Your family tree actually looks more like a diamond. In short. You are inbred. We all are. And we are all related. Think of it as a giant family Thanksgiving dinner. No one can expect to make it to dessert before Uncle Buck starts a thermonuclear war over the last drumstick. Or Cousin Alice starts suicide bombing your sister about past bad-boyfriends. That pesky DNA (common DNA) will keep us from getting along. It's fate. Or rather genes.

  3. Law and Order Reruns: Is it really a coincidence that there is a direct correlation between the number of Law and Order shows currently on TV (or in reruns) and the population growth? Or proportional with the increase in violence in the latter part and early part of the last 2 Centuries. Coincidence? Hardly. Current scientific study suggests that every time Robert Gorn of Criminal Intent makes a snarky comment, three cities in the world disappear off the face of the earth. If he tilts his head to the side, then you can also expect an earthquake in the region above a 7.0 on the Rhicter scale. It is also not widely known but the very relationship between Israel and the Arab Middle East hinges on the relationship between Elliot Staler and his on-again-off-again wife. Only until recently with the presidential campaign of red Thompson did people realize the profound effect on politics from the show. Elections are lost or won based on whether the jury at the end of an episode acquits. In fact, there is a persistent rumor in the scientific community that suggests that if the show ends without finding the killer (whether they are convicted or not), then there will be an invasion somewhere. And I think that tides are affected by Sam Waterston's tie choice. So you may not like the all day line-up of NY crime. But beware. Some think if you cancel it, a large black hole will open up in the earth's core. Of course some people think this is all hog wash and attribute all the same to CSI. There is something to be said about Horatio Cae's sun glasses and global warming.

So - to answer your question. No we cannot just get along. With things like floating chemical lures that AKE me look at her butt out there, unending L&O reruns that drive a man insane and cause mass murder, or the fact that I'm related to boss in some distant way will force us to always fight and argue.

There is one bright spot though. One cure out there. It comes from a much maligned, holiday film staring a recently displaced man raised by elves who walked throught the 7 layers of the candy cane forest and through the Lincoln Tunnel. Yes, Elf. It is known as the Code of the Elvs:
1. Treat Every Day Like Christmas.

2. There's Room For Everyone on the ice List.

3. The Best Way to Spread Christmas Ceer is Singing Loud for All to Hear.

There is hope after all. Thanks Budddy!

100 HRB

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16.12.08

iTunes, uTunes We All Tunes for iPods

Q: Dear 100HRB

How does one get their own podcast on iTunes?

Sincerely,
Pod Dweller

A: Dear Media Prima Donna:

Wait, your asking questions now? Well as the 1/2 of 100 HRB has already made clear readers (and contributors) should, "answer their own D$#@ quesiton(s)". But this 1/2 (who happens to be pulling the load) is far kinder, gentler, more handsome and manly. A true man doesn't curse (hopefully this will be catalyst enough to get the other 1/2 to post on his own blog).


But I digress. First let us define what is a podcast. Unless you have been living in a cave for the past five years you will know that a podcast is a video or audio series that is downloadable from iTunes and plays on either your MP3 device or computer. You can subscribe to podcasts so that new episodes are automatically downloaded on your iTunes player. Some are free and some have a fee associated with them. Podcasts do not play under shuffles. They are treated as separate than music files. Considering that Apple sold 1.2 billion iPods this year alone, distribution through iTunes seems the way to go. But it all depends on what you want to do.

So you think that you have some wonderful content to provide for iTunes Podcasters? The first thing you need to do is create recordings. As large as Apple company is they do not support the creation of podcasts from content owners. A simple and free download for audio recording software is Audacity. If you are creating a video podcast you may want to look into Quicktime 7 Pro.

Once you have created your recording you will need to host the file on a web-server with an RSS feed. If your podcast is apt to be wonderful you had better have a lot of money. Supporting many downloads to your Podcast requires a lot of server space. Server space costs a lot of money. WBEZ Chicago Public Radio pays about $104,000 per year just to pay for server space which enables millions of users to download the free This American Life podcast. I can think of many good podcasts (Fair Game) that went under simply because of lack of funding.

Finally, you need to submit your RSS web address to the iTunes Store. Apple would like to make this sound very easy but in actuality this submission is more of an application. To become a content provider you must complete the iTunes Online Application. So fill out the application and wait for a couple of years until some poor intern actually fields your request. Once you are a signed content provider you can set the price of your Podcast. Just beware- since iTunes is a behemoth distributor their share of sales is 30 cents for every dollar spent. Even Hollywood labor unions have fought with iTunes for a greater royalty when actors, directors and writers works are downloaded from iTunes...the union lost. iTunes lives and breathes by one-third of the buyers who account for 80 percent of revenues, according to Josh Bernoff of Forrester Research. So it isn't as though you can charge a lot otherwise demand will go down.

If your podcast is picking up speed faster than you can support server space you may want to outsource your server. In addition, you may want to procure the services of Podcast marketing specialists like Podtrac or comScore.

iTunes reports having over 100,000 requests for content to be distributed by them each week. I think what you will find is that getting your stuff out there is easy. Distributing it in such a way that it rises above the billions of other content is the difficult part (just ask 100HRB). Marketplace International, another great podcast, did a study and found that everything on iTunes has a market. Meaning, every piece of content distributed by iTunes has been downloaded or purchased by someone. So at least you know you will have one person interested in your podcast.
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3.12.08

The Dark Side: Matters of Darkest Dark

Q: What does Dark Matter look like?

Brown Dwarf

A: Dear MACHO:

Well, I am not a scientist. The closest I come is a social scientist and even then...a poor one. To that end...the 100HB's colleagues were supposed to answer this insidious question.

Your question is only the surface of deeper questions, such as, “What is Dark Matter?”, "How does one find it?", and "What is the purpose of Dark Matter?". I am glad you are so inquisitive- you must have a striking intellect.

The name ‘dark matter’ is given to the amount of mass whose existence is deduced from the analysis of galaxy rotation curves but which until now, has escaped detections. NASA’s Wilkinson Microwave Anisotropy Prove (WMAP) reveals that dark matter comprises 23% of the universe.


Dark Matters properties are as follows (and as argued):
  • Does not emit light
  • Does not absorb light
  • Can be detected indirectly by its gravity
  • Is invisible
So in answer to your questions as to what does it look like- invisible. Which only makes sense when you discover that while attempting to create the new invisibility cloak, researchers at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute and Rice University managed to create the darkest material ever made by man (0.045% reflection which beats out the current 1.4%). That is “Dark Matter”.
Scientifically, if one were to accept the Big Bang Theory, one would have to agree that something (or someone) organized matter to form the galaxies. Our galaxy is the Milky Way. The Milky Way contains about 100 billion stars. On still larger scales, individual galaxies are concentrated into groups, or what astronomers call clusters of galaxies. These all had to be organized. But by what? Some would argue God. Some would argue dark matter. The force, or glue, that holds the cluster together is gravity -- the mutual attraction of everything in the Universe for everything else. The space between galaxies in clusters is filled with a hot gas. In fact, the gas is so hot (tens of millions of degrees!) that it shines in X-rays instead of visible light. By studying the distribution and temperature of the hot gas we can measure how much it is being squeezed by the force of gravity from all the material in the cluster. This allows scientists to determine how much total material (matter) there is in that part of space.

Remarkably, it turns out there is five times more material in clusters of galaxies than we would expect from the galaxies and hot gas we can see. Most of the stuff in clusters of galaxies is invisible and, since these are the largest structures in the Universe held together by gravity, scientists then conclude that most of the matter in the entire Universe is invisible. This invisible stuff is called 'dark matter'. Current research is using the identification of dark matter in hopes to locate Black Holes. Dr. Prisin Chen of the Stanford Linear Accelerator center says:

"If a sufficient amount of small black holes can be produced in the early Universe, then the resultant remnants, which are stable and interact only through gravity, can be an interesting candidate for dark matter."

According to Nasa, there is currently much ongoing research by scientists attempting to discover exactly what this dark matter is, how much there is, and what effect it may have on the future of the Universe as a whole. In short…no one knows but God.

PS - By the other colleague:
The 100 Hour Board encourages self-discovery and self-learning (ie finding out yourself, and not just discovering, yes indeed you have an arm on the left side). For this reason 1/2 of the board has directed the other 1/2 to answer their own D$#@ quesiton.
And to good results. Excellent presentation of the facts and understanding in science. Some quick notes.
All of this must be framed in the light (ha ha) that all science is theory, and usually (esp in physics) a way to mathematically conform reality (observation) to a model. What fits. For example the entanglement effect (think quantum teleporation) was first predicted mathmatically than proven. String theory is just a series of math proofs. So dark matter and energy are essentially solutions to a very VERY long math problem.
We also "see" dark matter by the way we see objects. That is the dark matter deflects actual positions of matter into an Einstein ring.
All of this (and a really cool experiment you can try at home to "see" what Einstein rings look like - minute 6:45 on) is best explained by a fantastic video from TED by Patricia Burchat. I encourage you to view. Here is also the link.


We encourage you to check out TED more.
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