Circle of Life

Q Dear 100 Hour Board,

Now to get to my real question: How many donuts does Homer Simpson eat in one year?



A Dear Pastry Inquisitor,



With 10 Billion doughnuts consumed in the US, the average person eats roughly 33 doughnuts per year. I do not take Homer Simpson as a thoroughly 'average' person - more like above average (except maybe intellect). With a height of 6 feet and weighing anywhere from 239 to 300 pounds (all official numbers) his BMI is something between 32 and 40 - all considered obese. So I would put him in a consumption range of something like twice the normal person. Now not everybody eats doughnuts - let's say only 50% of American's do. That's 66 doughnuts per year - a little more than one a week. That just isn't Homerish. Let's consider the 80/20 rule, that 20% of the population eat 80% of the doughnuts - that puts us at an average of 167 doughnuts per person or 3.2 a week.

"American donuts. Glazed, powdered and raspberry-filled. Now how's that for freedom of choice?"

You would think that Homer eats this much each sitting - but he isn't going out and buying this all the time, so I think he relies on doughnuts offered at work, for the most part. That's usually 1 time per week for a good - labor job (like the nuclear plant) + birthdays (or 20 times for a standard department - although he might roam and forage). With church functions thrown in, I put that at 100 activities where doughnuts are served. Eating 3.2 each time, Homer eats about 320 doughnuts a year - sort of fitting in with our BMI calculations. It's a little under 1 a day - which works when we consider that in the mean time he's been to the moon, raced cars, scuba dived, etc. etc.

Now just for your consideration, Canada consumes the most doughnuts per capita in the world. So not only is Homer not a fan of Canada - he'll want to do things just a little better.

"Canada? Why would I want to leave America just to visit America, Jr.?"

Regards,
Looking for Donutions 100 Hour Board