Respect My Authoritah

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

2 Questions:

a. Who will win the 2008 presidential election? More importantly who will the VP be?(I'm thinking a Romney/Clinton ticket. ;/)

b. Why in heavens name does blogger need to have word verifications? What are their purpose? Why, oh, why must they be on the otherwise wonderful 100 hour board?

Finally, who decides what the verifications are? Computer generated or human- I've gotten some pretty funky ones.

I HATE WORD VERIFICATIONS-This has got to stop!!!!!

Regards,

"I Like Big [Turtle] Butts"

A: Dear Caboose Aficionado

My toddler pointed out to me that you did not ask 2 questions, but rather 6.

In light of this, the 100 Hour Board will take 600 Hours to answer your questions, exactly 25 days, luckily after Super Tuesday polling.

That being said, the 100HB is not a fortune teller, and cannot tell you what will be, however much that outcome is desired. As for political pundit, it seams the only requirement to be one is to not have a brain, so the 100HB cannot be that either. The Board does however offer you some insite:

a) The front runners right now are Obama for the Dems with 38 delegates (though Clinton is close with 36) and Romney for the Repubs with 72 (next is McCain with 38). The issues regarding state polling are key in each state, as they've helped generate surprises and uniqueness to the primaries. A cross-party ticket is unlikely, mainly because a candidate can't be of the party anymore to run on the other ticket. However the possible entrance of Bloomberg will be interesting. In the 100 Hour Board's opinion - the election will be between Clinton/Edwards and McCain/Romney. Although which is VP and P on the ticket is not clear.

b) From Blogger, "What [Word Verification] this does is to prevent automated systems from adding comments to your blog, since it takes a human being to read the word and pass this step. If you've ever received a comment that looked like an advertisement or a random link to an unrelated site, then you've encountered comment spam. A lot of this is done automatically by software which can't pass the word verification, so enabling this option is a good way to prevent many such unwanted comments." Those bloggers who are more senior and experienced (ie been blogging longer than October 2007, have had issues with spam comments. Word verification makes moderating easier. Please see previous posts regarding the 100 Hour Board and comment posting to help preserve the nature of the question/answer format.

Finally, word verifications come from the same place Family Guy jokes do (as referenced by South Park). Manatees in a giant tank select balls with letters on them in random order. Each sequence then becomes a word to verify against.

100HB

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Better than Ty Pennington

Q: Dear 'Your the best big brother' 100 Hour Board

How do you frame and remodel a basement?

Critchlow

A: Dear 'You'll grow up like me someday' little brother Critchlow,

Having a tough time with the basement? Moved into the mini-mansion and can't stand it not being finished? I offer you perfect advice.

1. Take a photo of your current basement as is
2. Develop the photos at the local 1 hour photo - or print it out yourself
3. Buy an inexpensive photo frame
4. Place the photo behind the glass, line up the mat
5. Put the frame back together - viola - framed basement

If you want to remodel it, you have several options:

• Buy it a sensible dress from J Crew and lay it on the floor
• Apply for Next Top Model and let Tyra do her work
• Ultimate help - Queer Eye for the Straight Basement
• Apply for While you were out

Now if these are sufficiently helpful for you, the 100 Hour Board asks, why finish the basement? There are plenty of activities suitable for use in an unfinished basement:

• Use it for roller hockey
• Fill it with water and open windows and use it for ice hockey
• If you're doing that, you can add curling and figure skating
• Set up a giant train track
• Roller derby
• Use all 4 walls and floor for chalk drawings
• Run a shoot house for the local SWAT team
• Two Utah words: Meth Lab
• Hydroponic tomatoes
• Start a business to bury mob hits
• Pour dirt on the floor and tell people you live in a home with dirt floors
• Fill it with ball pit balls - and have fun
• Glue foam on the walls and build a recording studio
• Mount trampolines on every surface and go nuts
• Use it to paint murals or graffiti
• Paint the floor and walls like you are looking down from Sky City in Star wars
• Build a miniature city and be your own king
• Dig a swimming pool down there
• Recreate Jabba's palace

If this still doesn't do it for you, try this.

Hope it helps.

HRB

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But Why? But Why? But Why?

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
What's another word for thesaurus?
If a turtle does not have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Just take your pick! Enjoy!
Good apple post-i like it!
80

A: Dear Overly-Inquisitive 80,

In no particular order:

eadumdictumbiblios
lexicon
synonymicon

There are lots of different types of glue. White glue and those in the bottle are drying adhesives - they bond as they dehydrate. So in the bottle they'll not bond while they still have water/alcohol, etc. But over time you can still end up finding a solid bottle of glue for this reason. Though note glue like this is fairly weak. There are natural, thermoplastic, heat activated, pressure sensitive, UV activated or reactive adhesives (like those that make your car quiet). And the glue mussels use to stick to rocks is pretty hard to beat. But in case you want to make your own:

Here's How:
Mix 1/4 cup hot tap water with 2 T powdered milk. Stir until dissolved.
Stir 1 T of vinegar into the mixture. The milk will begin to separate into solid curds and watery whey. Continue stirring until the milk is well-separated.
Pour the curds and whey into a coffee filter positioned over a cup. Slowly lift the filter, draining the whey. Keep the curd, which is in the filter.
Squeeze the filter to remove as much liquid as possible from the curd. Discard the whey (i.e., pour it down a drain) and return the curd to a cup.
Use a spoon to break the curd into small pieces.
Add 1 teaspoon hot water and 1/8 to 1/4 teaspoon baking soda to the chopped curd. Some foaming may occur (carbon dioxide gas from reaction of baking soda with vinegar).
Mix thoroughly until the glue becomes smooth and more liquid. If the mixture is too thick, add a bit more water. If the glue is too lumpy, add more baking soda.
The finished glue can vary in consistency from a thick liquid to a thick paste, depending on how much water has been added, how much curd was present, and how much baking soda was added.
Use your glue as you would any school paste. Have fun!
When not in use, cover your cup of glue with plastic wrap. Over time, its consistency will become smoother and more clear.
Unrefrigerated glue will 'spoil' after 24-48 hours. Discard the glue when it develops a spoiled milk smell.
Tips:
The separation of curds and whey works best when the milk is warm or hot (which is why powdered milk is used).
If the separation doesn't work well, heat the milk or add a bit more vinegar. If it still doesn't work, start again with warmer water.
Clean dried glue by loosening/dissolving it in warm water and wiping it away. Glue will wash out of clothes and off surfaces.
What You Need:
1/4 cup hot water
1 T vinegar
2 T powdered dry milk
1/2 tsp baking soda
water

A turtle without a shell is soup. But I prefer to think if they are missing a shell they are just au natural.

100 HB

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Keeps the Doctor Away...

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

Which part of the apple is healthier for you...the skin or the inside?

80

A: Dear Fruit Connoisseur:

Great question. Food and science - my favorite combination Let's start with the obviously gratuitous download of facts.

Apples, malus x domestica, was first domesticated in Kazakhstan, spread across the Middle East in Greece, on to Rome and the rest of Europe. There a quite a variety of crossbred apples, but mainly 4 types: cider, eating (desert), cooking and dual-purpose.

Apples are fruit, a developed part of the plant ovary that contains seeds and some form of transport material. Sometimes these are spikes or feathery things, but for apples the plant develops some storage tissue that is tasty solely for the purpose to be eaten by animals that the seeds will be transported away. It is not necessarily meant to be a meal - just tempting (like the serpent's apple). Not much in nutritional value: proteins, fats, but it has sugars and a whole host of vitamins. Add in some antioxidants, a few toxins at times and fiber (cellulose, hemi-cellulose and other plant matter) and you have yourself an apple.

Now to your question. Best answered with some math:

The difference in the two:

Medium apple skin
Energy g 18
Energy kj 75
Protein g 0.05
Total lipid (fat) g 0.10
Ash g 0.08
Carbohydrate g 4.59
Fiber g 2.3
Sugars g 2.65

Compare the two? Skin is definitely not more nutritious than the inside as a total - but considering it is a small portion of the apple, per ounce it is more nutritious. It does have over half the fiber of the apple, so if you're looking for ruffage and regularity eat the peel.

(All number courtesy from Nutrient Data Laboratory from the USDA.

100 Hour Board - I'm hungry now

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Freshman Orientation 101

Q: Dear 100 Hour Board:

I'm a new user, but like what I see. But I have to ask you:

Isn't it a little presumptive to label the post "funny," not that it wasn't, but still? [In reference to the 'farts are funny' comments]

oh, by the way please remove the blog owner approval of comments. it's annoying and stifles creativity

BL

A: Dear "I'm only a civil engineer, so please excuse me"

I'll talk slowly so you can follow. :)
The 100 Hour Board is both omniscient and metaphysically omnipotent. That is the 100 Hour Board knows perfectly what is funny or not, and can therefore apply the appropriate labels. The metaphysically omnipotent part comes from an ability to change reality if needs be. So, what the 100 HB says is funny - is. And if you didn't find it as such - then you've lost your funny bone, become boring, or are actually the butt of the joke. (you'll notice I've labeled the post as stupid and board - the stupid is obvious - and that is 'board' not 'bored'.)

As for moderated comments, they are there for 2 reasons:

1. To prevent ad spam from annoying blog spammers
2. So that questions are moderated and kept hidden until the response is given. Although random comments are authorized rather quickly as needed.

If you don't like it, then you can suffer in the darkness of ignorance without our help.

"The light in the darkness" 100 Hour Board

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Somebody Was in Trouble

Q: Dear "new" 2008 100 Hour Board:
My question is, what is the origin meaning of the statement "Your name is mud"?
Regards,
R

A: Dear R-
There is some confusion in this idiom, its origin misattributed to a historical news story that is at least fitting. Either way the phrase means that you are unpopular, or have a bad reputation.

First the misattributed origin.

Moments after Abraham Lincoln was assassinated at the theatre (in 1865), the shooter, John Wilkes Booth jumped from the President's box to the stage and broke his leg. While on the run, Booth and his accomplices stopped at Dr. Samuel Mudd's house in Maryland, a doctor who without knowing about the assassination, set Booth's leg. Mudd was convicted of being a conspirator, although he was later pardoned. But from that time on, Mudd's name has associated with a bad reputation - and we therefore tell people - your name is mud.

But - this idiom first appeared in Badcock's (aka 'J. Bee’) Slang (an idiom dictionary) in 1823. The entry reads:
"Mud - a stupid twaddling fellow. ‘And his name is mud!’ ejaculated upon the conclusion of a silly oration, or of a leader in the Courier."
Regards,
Spitting Image of Monkey's Uncle

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Like a Missing Sock

Q: Dear Long-Lost 100 Hour Board:

100 Hour Board,
Oh 100 Hour Board,
Wherefore art thou? Why must you be named 100 Hour Board. Refuse thy blogging name. Or if you cannot, swear you love me, and I'll no longer complain.

Regards,
Juliet Complainer

A: Dear Lost without a Guide,
First off, to correct you inquiry, the question "wherefore art thou Romeo" actually does not ask where is Romeo, but more like "why are you Romeo." Then Juliet talks about forsaking his name.
But to answer your question, the 100 Hour Board has been on hiatus, a vacation, for the end of last year. Things were busy of late, and the Board needed time to get things accomplished, such as:

• Negotiate multi-national, trade-relation deals between the US and European countries while at the same time take a cultural tour of host nations
• Conduct a corporate financial audit
• Design, purchase and prepare gift packages for inter-familial relations
• Conduct marine biology studies on native fish and reptile species, including environmental, behavioral monitoring
• Prepare multi-course, gourmet meals featuring various international cuisines

And a whole host of other activities. Hopefully, you all haven't been too deprived. The new season is open for more questions. And remember, applications are still open for open 100 Hour Board positions.

100HB

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